[EXPRESSO] Imaginary (2024) | Polterbear

Soo…. Blumhouse recent cinematic output that isn’t M3GAN has been quite the slop drop, and Imaginary is not gonna change that, but to my slight surprise, this is not as outright shit as Night Swim, despite both feeling like “january horror film releases”.

This time we deal with the idea of “imaginary friends” conjured up by children, and we focus on a children book’s author, Jessica, married to a musician named Max, that move back into Jessica’s childhood home, with the daughters from Max’s previous marriage, Alice and Taylor, in tow.

As Jessica struggles to connect with her new stepdaughters, keeps having nightmare of her insane father, Ben, and her children book’s characters, Alice finds a teddy bear in the basement and becomes attached to it to a creepy degree, while an elderly neighbour called Gloria approaches Jessica and shares memories of her childhood, which Jessica doesn’t seem to remember at all….

It doesn’t sound original, and it isn’t, ticking every box in the “supernatural horror with children and dolls” category, and since it’s a Blumhouse release, there’s gotta be an overemphasis on jump scares over trying to build some creepy atmosphere, some decent acting lost to one-note characters, and this case a script with some promise that ultimately is bogged down by too much worldbuilding and “Blumhouse claptrap”, so to say.

BUT i’ll say that it does pull a decent little twist halfway through, and the last act shows some creatitivity to the visuals, some ideas that give some needed energy to the trite formula, and it helps elevating it from being a total, predictable and boring shitfest, thought a bit frustrating since there was some potential to it, but instead it’s just a passable, if middling and instantly forgettable supernatural horror film by the ol’ “House Of Blum”.

[EXPRESSO] Five Nights At Freddy’s (2023) | Children Of Chuck E. Cheese

I kinda didn’t want to review this one for various reasons, but i did review The Flash movie after all, so let’s get this over with, shall we?

And FIY, i barely known anything about the games, i’ve seen some gameplay but i don’t know anything about this weird lore the series supposedly has running through, just the basic premise of the games, as in, it’s about a person employed as a night guard for an abandoned Chuck E. Cheese styled pizza place-kids entertaiment center, where the animatronics mysteriously still walk around its grounds and attack anyone they find in their roamings….

Kinda surprised it took so long for the series that basically invented the “mascot horror” subgenre to have its feature lenght film out, so long that a horror version of the Banana Splits came along, and we even had Nicolas Cage join into the mascot massacre fun with Willy Wonderland.

And honestly, in itself, it’s not very good… though i don’t think it’s very bad either.

Production value are fairly high, the animatronics look good and have a substantial presence on screen, though it takes a while for the movie to show and have the animatronics move about and do something of substance, as it spends a lot more screentime establishing its lore and okayish characters than in actually trying to be scary or gruesome.

Which itself it’s a non issue since this movie it’s clearly targeted at a children audience (even though most fans that grew up on the games are most likely in their 20s now) and relies on jumpscares, which maybe fitting, feels like a missed opportunity, since it’s really not scary…. but it’s also not deliberately trying to be child-friendly or goofy, kinda feels stuck in between, for whatever reason.

Still, not quite awful.