For another episodes of sequels no one asked but the second proved profitable enough, this is a series now, so whatever, Lake Placid 3 came into existence by first airing on SciFi in 2010, then hitting home video that same year. There was much rejoicing.
So, before i criticize the plot for a specific reason, i’m gonna talk about how for this one directing duties went to Griff Furst. A name that should feel familiar to longtime readers, as we reviewed some of his directed movies, such as the enjoyable Arachnoquake, the almost craptacular Ghost Shark, the awful slasher Maskerade, and one of the worse dinosaur movies i’ve ever seen, 100 Million BC. Also, something called Trailer Park Shark (aka Shark Shock).
This is a bit earlier in his career, but he was already establishing itself in the “bayou killer shark and/or croc” niche, so why not, hire him to do Lake Placid 3.
And have some full frontal nudity & intercourse in the first 5 minutes, just to make it clear what kind of trash this movie is gonna be. And clarity is all i ask of killer croc movies.
So, what is the plot about this time? Yet again the Bickermans, as the nephew of Sadie Bickerman and his family moved into the house by the lake to renovate and sell it, after “Sadie Leachman” was eaten by one of her own crocodiles while trying to feed someone to them. Some rare istance of karma at work.
For some stupid reason, the sheriff arrives and convinces them NOT to sell the house…. since he basically says the lake is now crocodile free. Why would he convince people that had a relative die by the very same crocodile mayhem she created to stay in that – by now infamous – place?
And guess what, the young boy, Connor, after chasing an escaped pet lizard, finds baby crocodiles and begin to secretly feed them. After 2 years have passed, Connor is now stealing meat from the supermarket to feed the now adult crocodiles…. it’s the same shit, only this time we have more locations where the people take refuge, like a supermarket and a gas station, so there’s that.
But still, this is cannibalistic rumination, regurgitation of regurgitation.
And it’s tiresome junk to boot, i mean, come up with something if you’re gonna bother making another one of these, make the croc mutate or the humans begin to mutate, do something with the continuity, make the fuckin kid do a Friday The 13 Part IV transformation into boy zombie or a killer copycat, DO SOMETHING with the given material. Especially since the kid it’s kinda weird anyway, as he doesn’t realized by himself feeding huge killer reptiles it’s a big fuckin no.
Anything instead of putting another group of teens and one of them hiring a hunter by the name of Reba to make sure his girlfriend, Ellie, won’t be taken advantage by one of the other teens, Aaron…. not that the guy actually explains the real reason, nor the script makes really r, since this creepy-ish boyfriend (yeah, they didn’t even actually break up) doesn’t tell Reba until late in the movie.
This is the kind of shit you get in Lake Placid 3, and yep, i’d say this is notably even worse than the second one, at the very best it’s on par, the CG for the crocs is ever so slightly worse too, but both are subpar and unnecessary regardless. You might enjoy this one slightly more due to extra nudity, more kills and overall bigger trash factor (it does have a person trying to chainsaw a crocodile in the ass, that counts for something), i kinda did, at times, but still, it’s pretty dang bad.
And i guess they either forgot entirely of the stolen crocodile eggs taken to a lab subplot that showed up at the end of Lake Placid 2, either that or they are saving it (or more likely remembering they set that plot point up at all) for the fourth one, hilariously titled “The Final Chapter”.
But assuming that would be expecting too much, i feel.
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