Creature From The Haunted Sea (1961) [REVIEW] | #giantmonstermarch

So yeah, this is not quite “giant monster” territory as the poster would imply, but i wanted to cover this one for a while and it will do as a parallel to Monster Armageddon, as any excuse to compare Roger Corman’s output of the 50s-60s with the Asylum’s to shame the latter… it’s a good one.

Even if it’s still a tale of lies, because this was deliberately made as a comedy but was never advertised as such, with the promotional material playing it straight, like this being a “serious” monster flick in the vein of Creature Of The Black Lagoon, only to ambush the audiences come to see this in a double feature with Devil’s Partner.

Goading people into seeing a deliberate farce, a parody of basically every movie Corman did to that point, another quickie he actually shot in Puerto Rico alongside Last Woman On Earth, but it wouldn’t be seen until a year later in 1961, a farce that also a political satire and then lastly a monster movie, with one of the silliest looking aquatic monsters ever, as if The Monster From Piedras Biancas was made to look as silly as the bird thing in The Giant Claw. Deliberately.

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The Spooktacular Eight #12: Microwave Massacre (1979)

There are many types of massacres.

You can opt for the classics of axe, chainsaw and proper sharp instruments that while not built for slaying the fellow man are indeed excellent for severing, cutting and shit like that.

Why not think outside the box… or inside the box, as in go for a power drill, a woodchipper, a nailgun or even just use all the things inside a toolbox?

Go cannibal while you’re at it.

I mean, this movie decided to do so but also title its massacre after a microwave… which isn’t the actual weapon of killing, while being pivotal to the protagonist’s agenda, after he uses a salt grinder to kill his nagging wife May, obsessed with haute cuisine, during a drunken rage one night.

He sober ups the next day, completely unaware of what he did the night before… until he finds the corpse stuffed into their new huge ass microwave, decides to quickly dispose of his wife remains by dismembering and hiding it in the fridge, only to later accidentally take a bite out of May’s tinfoiled hand, liking the taste, things lead to things, and to Donald cooking the body parts in the microwave, finding the “blood feast” quite delish. So much that he starts killing hookers so he keep his cannibalistic cuisine going, sharing it with his unsospecting coworkers, even.

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