[EXPRESSO] Onward (2020) | Dad Quest

Onward 2020 poster.jpg

Yeah, due to the COVID-19 lockdown, this was delayed… until theathers reopened yesterday in Italy, pretty much. For U.S. moviegoers, this will old hat, as the movie debutted there in march, but eh, what you gonna do?

After the fun but kinda pointless rethread of Toy Story 4, Pixar here treats us to a story about two brothers in a quest for an artifact to make their deceased father exist – completely, that is – for one more day, all set in a fantasy suburbia world of elfs, cyclops, goblins, station wagons, smarthphones and convenience stores, as technology advanced and made magic basically obselete over the millennia. Yes, still a better modernized fantasy world than Bright, let’s just get that out right away.

And there’s a token minor LGBT character (a cyclops cop), so token it’s made so by a single line, not bad or offensive, the character isn’t completely pointless to the plot, to be fair, it’s just….yeah, nothing to really brag about, given it’s ancillary status, but Pixar needed some social media icons for Pride Month, so…

That aside, it’s good mix of family drama and road movie, with some fun characters design, likeable characters (even if it’s another tale of getting over feelings of inadequacies, this time exploring brothers and fathers relationship), funny spins on fantasy and GDR clichès leading to some pretty good visual jokes, pacing is perfect, the moral becomes obvious but still feels earned (and the lesson at the end actually gels together with the themes), there’s even some action with swords and dragons and stuff.

Definitely a step up from Toy Story 4, and better than one would reasonably expect from Dan Scanlon, who previously directed that Cars supernatural-ish spin-off short…. and Monster University (the only review i still regret writing). Good one.

expresso-icona

Mississippi River Sharks (2017) [REVIEW] | Senior Rodeo Daredevils

Mississippi River Sharks 2017.png

I’ve finally found a version with the original english voices (and in hindi, again), so time to review this one as well!

And it’s quite the shark dropping we have, because 1 minute in you’ve already seen the best part, it’s not even from the actual movie, it’s a clip from a fake in-movie shark series called Shark Bite, and this ties into the actual plot of the movie, with sharks attacking river boats in Mississippi and then disrupting a fish rodeo (possibly held by ol’ Jim Slater ) presented by the main lead of the fake Shark Bite movie series.

Continua a leggere “Mississippi River Sharks (2017) [REVIEW] | Senior Rodeo Daredevils”

One Piece: Romance Dawn Story OVA (2008) [REVIEW]

One Piece Romance Dawn Story 2008 OVA.png

Director: Katsumi Tokoro
Writer: Tsuyoshi Sakurai

Here’s another quite nostalgic OVA, as in 2008, for its 40th Anniversary Shonen Jump held the Super Anime Tour, and Toei was commissioned a recreation not of One Piece, but of Romance Dawn, the one-shot story (the first version, in this specific case) Eiichiro Oda created and that eventually served as a base for One Piece, not only in premise but also character designs, and became a naming convention, so much that the first One Piece chapter is titled “Romance Dawn” as well. Continua a leggere “One Piece: Romance Dawn Story OVA (2008) [REVIEW]”

One Piece: Defeat The Pirate Ganzack OVA (1998) [REVIEW]

One Piece Defeat The Pirate Ganzack OVA 1999.png

Director: Goro Taniguchi
Writer: Hiroaki Kitajima

YES, finally time to talk about this one!

While a lot of One Piece fans know about this OVA, i fear it’s not as well known as it should, and regardless, it’s an interesting piece of One Piece media, a look into what could have been if Toei didn’t eventually took upon adapting Eiichiro Oda’s manga into an anime series in 2001. Continua a leggere “One Piece: Defeat The Pirate Ganzack OVA (1998) [REVIEW]”

Senran Kagura: Beach Peach Splash PS4 [REVIEW] | Wetworks

Senran Kagura Peach Beach Splash PS4.jpg

Copy Purchased
Platform: PS4
Developed by: Tamsoft, Honey Parade Games
Players: 1 offline (2-10 Online)
Also Available On: Steam

Many thing can be said about the Senran Kagura series, but i give Marvelous a lot of credit for going fuckin bananas with the franchise. For such a niche series of beat em up games, you won’t expect at all a rhythm game spin-off, or basically their take on Splatoon, i really like that constantly try to expand it in such oddball fashion. You’ve got bahonkas of steel, Marvelous, no doubt about it.

We’re going knee deep. In the plot. Continua a leggere “Senran Kagura: Beach Peach Splash PS4 [REVIEW] | Wetworks”

Hentatsu (2020) [REVIEW] | A Cat And Oni Walk Into A Bar

Hentatsu TV 2020.png

This late june, i was on a kick to discover/watch what else director TATSUKI made after the first season of Kemono Friends, and among them Hentatsu felt in that category of “i’ve seen some images time ago of this, but i have zero idea of what it’s about”.

And after watching the whole series, i still don’t fully know how to answer the implied question, it sure wasn’t what i expected from studio Iroiro and TATSUKI – as you can tell immediately they made it – but it isn’t the usual ensemble of weird animal people or “humans” fighting against weird misterious enemy in the backdrop of a vague post-apocalyptic setting. Continua a leggere “Hentatsu (2020) [REVIEW] | A Cat And Oni Walk Into A Bar”

Summer Shark Attack/Ozark Sharks (2016) [REVIEW] | Fireworks Sharks

Ozark Sharks AKA Summer Shark Attack 2016

We’ll do Mississippi Shark Attack later (maybe), first we have to deal with sharks in the Ozarks region, because as we know damn well by now, the lack of oceans or seas won’t stop sharks (especially TV movies’ sharks) from appearing, as Dolph Lungren and Mackenzie Rosman (just to name a couple of random names) are well aware.

Also know as Summer Shark Attack, let’s be as specific as possible, it’s not like 99 % of these movies take place in the summer or in sunny places anyway. Then again, there are winter shark attack movies (more than they should), so the need to specify in what season it takes place is not completely useless. Continua a leggere “Summer Shark Attack/Ozark Sharks (2016) [REVIEW] | Fireworks Sharks”

Mega Shark VS Crocosaurus (2010) [REVIEW] | Now With Extra Bacon

Mega Shark VS Crocosaurus 2010

Mega Shark is back, because the first one was boring as shit, but it was cheap enough and turned out to be profitable, so here, have another one, this time pitting the MEGA Shark agains the dreaded Crocosaurus, which isn’t MEGA, and sounds more like an extra crispy fast food specialty item, or a ice sammich.

And when i say Mega Shark is “back”, i guess it is, it’s a shark, it’s way bigger than it should be, it can do impossible jumps, and i guess we can believe it’s the same one from Mega Shark VS Giant Octopus, there is a japanese poster for that movie to be seen, and there’s a photo of Debbie Gibson, who was in that movie. So yeah, it’s totally a sequel, despite the completely different cast and plot that doesn’t follow from the end of the previous movie… but since Jaleel White feels like it’s the same one from before, i’m inclined to trust him. Wouldn’t you? Continua a leggere “Mega Shark VS Crocosaurus (2010) [REVIEW] | Now With Extra Bacon”

6 Headed Shark Attack (2018) [REVIEW] | Math Sharks

6 Headed Shark Attack 2018

Welcome to the confusingly titled (at this point i think on purpose) 4th entry in the “n-Headed Shark Attack” series. By this time even the Leprechaun series went to space (and to Las Vegas), but nope, this entry makes the multi-headed shark crash a couples rehab camp. No, not in an Octodad style, with the shark in a suit preteding to be human. I would have liked the effort, if anything.

Instead here the shark just has 6 heads, and it goes after a group of people attending one of those “phones away, and far from civilization” camps, to mend relationships, done in a co-op survival challenge way, in this case in Isla Corazon. I’d wish people that make synopsis of these movies on IMDB actually watched these movies, but whatever. Continua a leggere “6 Headed Shark Attack (2018) [REVIEW] | Math Sharks”

2 Headed Shark Attack (2012) [REVIEW] | Double Hit

2 Headed Shark Attack 2012

Title engineering is the heart of shlock, it was so in the 50s and it didn’t really change much, just got worse, in an oversaturated ocean that somehow finds lube for another pile of shark movies, and among the endless waves of those, there certainly was one called 2 Headed Shark Attack… and also called Monster Shark Attack, this movies can’t have just a single title, apparently.

You already know if you’re in by the tone you’re reading the title. Continua a leggere “2 Headed Shark Attack (2012) [REVIEW] | Double Hit”