Dino Dicember #19: Super Mario Bros The Movie (1993)

I could have waited until that animated Super Mario movie Nintendo commissioned Illumination (urgh) released… but sure as shit it isn’t coming out this year (not like it was gonna, it was slated for a 2022 release before the COVID-19 pandemic anyway), and i’m doing Dino Dicember… well, in Dicember, so it’s a pretty good “excuse” for me to watch and review the infamous Super Mario Bros live-action movie. And i do enjoy the challenge, it’s not like it’s this obscure adaptation nobody on the internet talked about, but let’s give the movie a fair shake with almost 2 decades of hindsight.

And yes, it totally counts, since it’s about a dinosaur dimension that originated from the meteor that hit Earth 65 millions years ago, which actually created two parallel dimensions of Earth, one inhabited by reptile people descending from dinosaurs, and ours of “human people” descending from primates. As the resources have dried up on the “dino end”, the leader of the dino-people, Koopa, sends minions in our dimension to search for a fragment of the meteor that split the dimensions to begin with, so he can unite the two and rule them under his scaly thumb.

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Dino Dicember #14: GON (manga)

Today we’re doing something quite good and that could use more coverage, as the days of having him as a guest star fighter in Tekken 3 are long gone. Pun not intended.

Yeah, while it has a cult following and it’s revered by many manga (and comic book) fans, GON today is mostly forgotten, and the title will more likely make Gon Freeks, the protagonist of Hunter X Hunter come to mind in manga/anime circles.

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Dino Dicember #12: Terrordactyl / Jurassic Wars (2016)

“Pteranoperil” was too bland, i guess, but feel free to use that one, if you want.

So yeah, i got this while hunting for dinosaur flicks on Amazon, and the UK DVD copy goes under the “Jurassic Wars” title, but at least the cover promises pterodactyls… and the movie is about pterodactyls. Checks out, not always a given with these kind of movie covers that promise more than the movie can actually deliver.

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Dino Dicember #2: Raptor Ranch / The Dinosaur Experiment (2012)

Because Jurassic Farm was too obvious, or lacked the everpopular combo of assonance and allitteration. Still better than the other alternative title this movie goes under, you don’t get much more generic that “The Dinosaur Experiment”.

Just make it nice and obvious for everyone.

Now i would discuss the plot, but there’s very little in that regard. In Fossile Ridge, a reclusive mad scientist has been secretly experimenting with bird DNA, and managed to make dinosaurs while hiding in a Texan cattle ranch. One of the dinos escapes, starts killing people, which prompts the FBI and the local police to investigate.

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[EXPRESSO] Lupin III – The First (2019) | LUPIIIIIIIN THE THIRDDDDDD

was supposed to see this one in theathers (if you didn’t know, Lupin III was and still incredibly popular here in Italy, so much a couple of licensed PS2 videogames technically have a PAL release because they were only released in Italy, outside of Japan) back in march, but the lockdown happened, and eventually this one was snapped by Amazon as a Prime Video Exclusive. Smart move, in hindsight, since i was also waiting to see the second MHA movie, which got a new release window…. but cinemas have closed, as we’re in a quasi-lockdown situation.

I’m faffing around because i really don’t have to introduce Lupin III, now, do i?

The plot is fairly typical, concerning a book by the archeologist Bresson, containing a mysterious treasure and encased in a cryptic mechanical contraption, and standing as the only one the original Arsenè Lupin wasn’t able to get. But not only Lupin The Third himself wants to do out his grandfather, a girl named Laetitia and a surviving nazi group are also after the treasure.

It’s what many would call “classic Lupin III”, it’s quite appropriate (even more since it’s dedicated to Lupin III’s author, Monkey Punch, who passed away in April 2019), and it’s still quite a blast, thanks in no small parts to the downright amazing 3D CG animation by TMS Entertaiment and Marza Animation. The animation itself is worth the “ticket” by itself, just a masterful implementation of this style, which is often derided as stiff or a cheap compromise that never satisfies or manages to translate “anime” into CG.

THIS is how you do it.

To draw a comparison with another new film based on an old series also released that year, this is definitely better than City Hunter: Private Eyes, in pretty much everything.

[EXPRESSO] The Personal History Of David Copperfield (2019) | Paupers, Please

Based on the novel by Charles Dickens… one i will admit to be not THAT familiar with.

So don’t expect me to compare it to the many other film or TV adaptations of the story, i simply can’t and won’t. But i will describe the basic plot, just in case.

Starting at the end, the movie has David Copperfield chronicle his life, from his brief moment of idyllic joy visiting the family of his nanny at their bout house in Yarmouth, to her moment remarring to a a cruel man who exiles him to London, making him work at his factory, and meeting many colorful characters that live in similar if not more crushing and dismaying poverty. After hearing of his mother’s death and funeral, he escapes from the dismal life at the factory to his eccentric aunt, and her even more eccentric lodger, flip-flopping between the wealth of the “gentlemen’s lifestyle” and his past miseries coming back to him.

So, i saw “The Personal Life Of David Copperfield” yesterday… and it was good. Perfect casting, amazing performances, the characters are charming and memorable, it gets a good balance between the whimsical positive attititude and the abject squallor of the poor in victorian London (as you would expect), and the themes of class conflict still work, even with the whimsical tone and the over the top characters.

Quite funny, but at times its so enamored with his “british comedy wit” that comes off as a bit grating. Still charming, absolutely, but a bit grating and self-indulgent, even if it’s deliberately done. That said, it’s a good one from director Armando Iannucci, i’d say. Not great, but good.

I really don’t know how it stacks up against the other film adaptations of the tale, but in its own, i’d recommend it.

[EXPRESSO] Missing Link (2019) | Le Tour Du Sasquatch

Definitely one of the movies i’ve been looking forward to this year (again, came out last year in the US, but not here), always up to see what Laika Studios are doing next, and Kubo was great.

This latest feature is set in 1886, and sees cryptozoologist ante-litteram Sir Lionel Frost respond to a misterious letter that hints at the possibility of finding the fabled “missing link”, and embarks on a quest, as finding it would also give him recognition from his fellow adventurers, including his rival.

So the search for sasquatch begins in the Pacific North West…. and then begins again when Sir Lionel finds out who sent the letter, and why.

The plot offers an interesting variation on the old adventures flicks where British guys went around the world to “discover” and “civilize-colonize” all they could get their cane on, while maintining the old clichès like the bar fights, assassins sent after them by the main villain that epitomizes the old world of arrogant status-quo.

Not that Lionel himself is that much better, but it’s all to feed into the theme of family and what comes with a ugly duckling type story, one featuring a lovably awkward sasquatch and great characters.

You can see where the plot is going, but it’s a fun ride, the character designs and stopmotion animation are top notch as you would expected, the art direction amazing, the slapstick is quite decent, too. At times the dialogue tries to be a little too clever, but it’s mostly quite well and smartly written, just throwing a couple of puerile jokes because it has to (being a kids movie). Oddly some of the funniest moments are quite simple, in contrast to some of the more complex verbal gags that don’t fully land.

It’s pretty good, yes.

Gamera The Complete Collection UK BLURAY [REVIEW] | Absolute Pristine Turtle Meat, Really Neat

Arrow Video keeps being a shining beacon of light in a world where companies are planning to stop making physical media all together, so they can hold properties hostage on another streaming service with no guarantee film and series will always be there, or there in a matter of months, for that matter.

This time they bring us a collection that will make kaiju fans furiously ejaculate, and for good reason, as there wasn’t any complete collection of the beloved Gamera series, there were some boxsets for the North American market, but nothing complete, and here in Europe TM we got it far worse, Italy especially, as they brought only 5 five of the Showa Era, often calling Gamera “The Great King” and retitling the movies to imply it’s Godzilla or King Kong, with craptacular marquee artworks to boot.

But now it’s all good again, as this boxset (which i preordered as soon as i saw it) is shipping worlwide, and it’s all english… but it’s also a limited release, so i’m just gonna say this to interested fans: stop reading, and get it RIGHT NOW, this is pricey and there aren’t gonna be that many copies around, so just go. Definitely worth the price, it’s not cheap, at all, but it’s worth every single cent. Continua a leggere “Gamera The Complete Collection UK BLURAY [REVIEW] | Absolute Pristine Turtle Meat, Really Neat”

One Piece 3D: Trap Coaster (2011-2012) [REVIEW] | 3D Water Park Pirates

One Piece 3D Trap Coaster 2011-12.png

Director: unknown

Writer: unknown

Unlike the previous One Piece featurettes, shown alongside that year’s feature film of the series, Trap Coaster was – fittingly so- shown in water parks and the like as a limited “theathrical” release (as in i guess it was shown inside small locales repurposed as temporary cinemas, or something like that, i don’t really know) between December 1, 2011, and February 27, 2012.

Of course never re-released in any official capacity anywhere, so it’s no wonder it’s almost unknown even to One Piece fans, but internet exists, so you can find it subbed. Continua a leggere “One Piece 3D: Trap Coaster (2011-2012) [REVIEW] | 3D Water Park Pirates”

One Piece: Dream Soccer King (2002) [REVIEW] | King Of Table Soccer

One Piece Dream Soccer King 2002.png

Director: unknown

Writer: unknown

The second featurette, another theatrical short, was shown before (and on the japanese DVD release was bundled with) the third One Piece movie, Chopper’s Kingdom in the Strange Animal Island.

And again, it was never officialy released outside of Japan, which is true for pretty much all the featurettes and theathrical shorts. Continua a leggere “One Piece: Dream Soccer King (2002) [REVIEW] | King Of Table Soccer”