[EXPRESSO] Arknights iOS | Medicated Nation

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So yeah, Yostar’s new gacha game, looks a lot more like Girls Frontline (or an anime take on The Division) than Azur Lane but isn’t any of that, it’s a tower defense thingie with people befitted of the ever popular animal ears, because. The vague plot sees you as the amnesiac leader of pharmaceutical-commando company Rhodes Island, in a world afflicted by Catastrophes, bringing destruction and the precious mineral known as Originium, which infects people with the mysterious disease of “Oripathy” ( awakening powers but also being lethal in the long run), and you fight the other factions at play, the cultish Reunion and the military force of the city of Chernobog.

Plot is decent, character design good for this type of game, and gameplay wise – as i said -, it’s a tower defense affair: you put units on the available grid spaces to stop the enemy units from entering through the gate/s at the end. If anything, the surprisingly long tutorial-prologue will get you up to speed to the basics and Arknight’s minor but nice additions to the formula. The usual free-to-play bullshit isn’t that bad either, as the game gives you useful items to start with (not just crap), but of course wants you to roll the gacha for characters with an alluring design by using real money.

Aside from some inusual design choices, like characters who don’t receive exp directly from fights (instead you gotta use xp item received as rewards to level them up), Studio Montagne’s game is fairly good in itself, with a good introduction of new enemy types and objects to keep things interesting, using actual gameplay to keep you coming back, instead of just using the typical psychological hooks to make you log in something way repetitive  that basically plays itself (hi, Azur Lane).

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[EXPRESSO] Cats (2019) | IDW DA NYA

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Yes, we didn’t get this till now, and i was honestly looking forward to see this, to witness how bad it was, for someone that never saw or cared about the play or Thomas Steams Elliot book upon which the musical was notoriously based on.

Maybe it’s because of this, but i was expecting a mountain of weird and baffling stuff, and i wasn’t disappointed, actually found myself quite enjoying it as a “so bad it’s good” experience.

What’s the plot? A group of cats calling themselves “Jellicle Cats” find an abandoned new cat in the streets, they present themselves to her in musical fashion (as you’d expect), tell of their annual dance communion, which culminates in a contest to determine which Jellicle Cat will be sent to the Heavyside Layer in order to be reborn. But an evil magical cat (that seems to have eaten the Sand Sand fruit) wants to sabotage the ritual in order to be chosen for the “cat rapture”.

Why the human-cats hybrids’ size and proportions are constantly changing and not quite matching the size of streets and interiors? Why are they both naked AND clothed at the same time? Why do they look so fuckin creepy and uncanny, being frankly unbelievable in every sense of the word, despite the CG being not cheap by any means? Why is Ian McKellen here to basically mutter and meow like he’s just minutes away from dying? Why Tom Hooper (definitely not the right choice) decided to direct it?

Why Judie Dench is so freaky as Old Deuteronomy, and becomes even more uncomfortable to watch when she lays in the cradle, splaying and spreading?
Really, she’s uncanny.

Not that you’re supposed to ask many (or preferably, any) of these questions.
It don’t matter anyway.

Some nice songs, though.

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[EXPRESSO] Fantasy Island (2020) | Horror Spice

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So this is basically a horror reimagining of a 70’s/80’s tv series, one i’ve never even heard before i stumbled upon the listing of this movie, but i guess if children shows like The Banana Splits can get remade as horror movies, it’s fair game for everybody.

The premise centers around the eponymous, remote tropical island, where the mystical Mr. Roarke (Michael Peña) makes the most secret dreams of his guests come true. But as the fantasies morph into nightmares, the captive guests have to solve to mystery of the island if they want to escape it, and the true reason they were all brought there.

I frankly don’t know or care if this is a “needed” or random remake of the source material, but even so, i could see this movie working even without the horror elements, which at times they do spice things up a bit, but on other occasions are so tacked on and clichè to the point of being just laughable, just thrown together into the supernatural thriller-drama cauldron, using the premise to link together scenes from different genres (a bit of Saw, a bit of war movie, a bit of heist movie, a family drama) in a coherent way.

And it works, it’s what i would classify as “movie meatloaf”, but it’s entertaining, fairly well acted, has decent characters, but it should (and could) have been shorter, as the last act drags on by using horror cliches, and it’s odd how mostly bloodless it is for a horror movie, not that this one actually needed Braindead/Dead Alive levels of gore, or horror elements to begin with. It’s not a case of “neutering for the sake of PG-13”, it just a story that could have done without being horror “flavored” and not lose much.

It’s alright.

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[EXPRESSO] Jojo Rabbit (2019) | Achtung! The Desert Night of The Lepus

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Yeah, we didn’t get this in theathers until last week.

Johannes “Jojo” Betzler (anime joke) is a shy 10 year old boy who has trouble making friends, he’s always clumsy and reluctant, so he ends up earning the mocking nickname of being a cowardly “rabbit” (hence the title) by his peers and superiors, because just being in the Hitler Youth wasn’t enough. But fear not, for Jojo has an imaginary friend to rely on, Adolf Hitler (played by Waititi himself, and with gusto), always ready to give him advice when the need arises.

But despite aspiring to belong, he discovers that there’s a jewish girl taking refuge in their house, and experiences many events that make him question the rigid nazi indoctrination received, the arian myth, and all that bullshit, and he digests this……. like a 10 year old boy would.

Despite the edgy-looking premise, Taika Waititi’s “springtime in Germany opus” (loosely based on the novel “Caging Skies” by Christine Leunens) is actually very heartwarming, colorful and playful, but definitely doesn’t pull punches, balancing out drama and comedy like good black comedies do, and i’m kinda surprised by the style of comedy. Sure, Waititi/Imaginary Hitler is goofy and quite fun to watch, there are more flamboyant outbursts, but many jokes are done with an almost deadpan delivery.

Which mostly works, but some scenes would have benefitted by a more outlandish visuals, while others do work better because the characters shrugh off absurd stuff happening, which ultimately makes some of them lacking the impact they’re searching for, not flop totally, but also not making you burst out laughing.

Despite this gripe, it’s a surprisingly uplifting movie, with a very good cast, good characters, but i completely understand why it could fall kinda flat for others, not necessarily because of its subject.

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[EXPRESSO] The Lodge (2019) | Ich Sect

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After the tragic suicide of their mother, a couple of sibling is spending the weekend before Christmas in a mountain lodge with their new stepmother, whom they actively dislike (and kinda blame for their mother’s death, for reasons that are kinda spoiler). As thing between them seem to finally improve, strange events start affecting them, and the stepmother’s past as the only survivor of a cult mass suicide begins to surface…

Good atmosphere, good performances, but there’s also a reason if it felt similar to Goodnight Mommy, of course it does, it’s from the same directors, Veronica Franz and Severin Fiala, which in itself should be a glowing recommendation, but this simply isn’t as good, as – besides the slow pace – it feels more indecisive if to go the paranormal-possession or the paranoia-hallucination route, so it kinda takes time before unveiling the twist, which makes sense and brings some intense scenes, but it’s not particularly satisfying and can kinda be see coming.

Doesn’t help it’s edited in a way that i kinda expected the film to end a couple of times before the actual finale (not sure if good or kind of a cop-out), and the whole stepmother’s backstory about the religious cult doesn’t really make for original or particularly effective visuals (kinda cliched, actually), but it handles them better than regular movies about possessions and religious rituals. And still, it has its creepy and intense moments, the acting is quite good, it’s a more than decent horror thriller that it’s worth seeing, even if a better script would have been welcome.

And the – sadly – unfavorable comparison to Goodnight Mommy isn’t unfair, i fear it’s kinda unavoidable (for the previously mentioned reasons). Not exactly disappointing, but it’s a bit frustrating as you can see how it could have been better. 😦

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[EXPRESSO] 21 Bridges/City Of Crime (2019) | Good Cop, Bad Cop

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Here in my country this one (retitled “City Of Crime” because originality) was advertised highly on having Black Panther’s star Chadwick Boseman and being “from the creators of Avengers Endgame”, the marketing cleverly not specifing it’s just produced by Joe and Anthony Russo, and after watching it i realized why, the signals were fairly clear to begin with, and it’s not exactly a “con job”.

It’s just a ploy to get you to watch another cop thriller with a manhunt through the streets of Manhattan, or in these case, the titular 21 bridges (which isn’t actually correct, but whatever), closed in order to avoid the killers (guilty of killing many cops in a failed heist) escaping, but it has to be done all in one night, etc. etc. It’s not a bad setup, but it’s a fairly typical nonetheless, like the main character, the exemplary cop with an unbreakable sense of duty and justice, who finds his beliefs challenged as things get more complicated and he suspect of an internal conspiracy… not that you need that to explain corrupt cops, but whatever.

And it’s decent, even if you’ve already seen this kinda of plot and characterization many many times, with a great cast that’s a bit too good for these characters, not completely stereotypical ones, but – again – very typical. Direction by Brain Kirk (TV director on Boardwalk Empire, Penny Dreadful, GoT, etc. here at his movie debut) is decent-good, it’s fairly fast paced, doesn’t pull punchers, and there’s no tonal problems or unbalance in themes like the movie rooting a bit too much for the cops despite showing how blatanlty corrupt they can be, nothing like that.

If anything, the italian marketing will “dupe” people into seeing a perfectly decent – if fairly disposable – cop thriller drama.

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Krampus: The Reckoning (2015) [REVIEW] | Children Of The Krampus

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What happens when you wanna cash-in by exploiting the latest fad in the christmas horror subgenre, but you don’t have enough time in order to write it from scratch and push it out of the door in order to maximize exposure? Continua a leggere “Krampus: The Reckoning (2015) [REVIEW] | Children Of The Krampus”

Krampus: The Christmas Devil (2013) [REVIEW] | Krampus Rip My Flesh

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While most people are aware of Michael Dougherty’s Krampus movie from 2015, it wasn’t the first horror movie about the mythological figure of the Krampus, which became a horror sub-sub-genre from the early 2010’s onwards, and i guess you could say Jason Hull’s 2013 movie kickstarted this “krampusxploitation” movement, the Krampus itself had been subject of some tv series episodes, but not a feature lenght film. Continua a leggere “Krampus: The Christmas Devil (2013) [REVIEW] | Krampus Rip My Flesh”

[EXPRESSO] My Name Is Dolemite (2019) | Rat Soup

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Time for me to get some use out my Netflix subscription, and this wasn’t gonna screen in Italy anyway.

Shame, because the idea of a biopic about Rudy Ray Moore, the comedian better known to film buffs as his character Dolemite, starring in the eponymous movie and the sequel The Human Tornado (and many others), is a great idea. Especially the first Dolemite is a legendary and beloved piece of blaxploitation cinema, one of the few films where the boom mic is visibly in the movie more than the villain, and with overall quality rivalled only by stuff like The Guy From Harlem.

Telling the story of Rudy Ray Moore, an aspiring 70s Los Angeles comedian that manages to finally find success with his alter-ego/character of Dolemite, a foul mouthed motherfucker in pimp attire, leading to do some comedy records, which brings him some fame and money, all risked to make a movie about the character, in spite of everyone’s advice and good ol’ common sense (like a 70’s black version of Ed Wood, in a way), but Rudy is not gonna have it any other way.

While it’s even better for film buffs that already knew of the story, it’s an amazing portrait of a man struggling to make his name known, to realize it’s dream, and his ambivalent relantioship to the Dolemite persona he doesn’t really identify with after all, but can’t also give up. And isn’t exactly a flattering portrait, but it shouldn’t be, and the script has a perfect balance of goofy and serious, with space for more somber (and not somber) self-reflection, but also to lovingly recreate ridiculous scenes from the first Dolemite movie, with a top notch cast (which includes Snoop Dogg/Lion), especially Eddie Murphy who is killing it as Rudy/Dolemite.

He ain’t lying.

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[EXPRESSO] Gemini Man (2019) | I, Will Smith

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Based on a 70’s tv series i have never seen (heard the name, but that’s it), this movie has spent his fair amount of time in development hell, it seems. But even if i didn’t made some research before watching, it still would seem like a movie from decades ago, defrosted now due to the technology permitting to have an actor and a young, de-aged version of same actor on screen and making them interact in a believable fashion.

The premise sees Henry Brogan (played by Will Smith) as one of the most talented snipers the US government ever, now wishing to retire. The news isn’t taken well so he’s framed by an old aquaintance of his, that in meantime carried on the Gemini project, and unleashes a younger and zealous version of Henry at him, when everything else fails. Henry (aided by an old friend and a D.E.A. agent that had the misfortune of knowing about him) so tries to stop his younger clone and to steer him away from his path…

Technically impressive, with some decent-good action scenes, themes fairly typical of Ang Lee’s cinema, the movie has a good – albeit not original and kinda retrò – premise, and you want to see it fulfilled… but it never truly does. Performances are mostly good, but the script really isn’t up to snuff, it too seems unearthed after a decade or two, with some minor upgrades (like drones), and it’s the big bad problem here.

Doesn’t help that the supporting characters are… definitely there in the scene with a purpose, the romance is fairly bland (inoffensive, but also dated), and the dialogue isn’t anything to write home either. Pity. 😦

At the very least, it’s miles, miles better (even as basic entertaiment value go) than Rambo V, so… It’s alright, kinda.

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