[EXPRESSO] Nosferatu (2024) | Orlok Spelled Forward

I have been waiting for this one a LOT, i made no mistery of it, and why should i?

Robert Eggers doing a remake/new version of horror silent classic Nosferatu, i shouldn’t even need to add more than that. And i won’t.

But yes, it might sound strange to younger horror fans, it’s a new version of an early unauthorized Dracula adaptation that was considered lost for decades, only to resurface and become a silent horror film classic on its own, so i guess there’s little point discussing the plot too much, it’s literally Dracula.

I mean, there’s no denying around that, but Eggers version actually manages the near impossible, as it captures the original film dreamlike quality while also giving it a new spin to the material (while also featuring most of the classic scenes of Dracula adaptations), going for a psychosexual horror thriller that on the surface might remind some of Coppola’s Dracula adaptation, while there’s no baroque romanticism, over the top hairdos or extra fancy costumes.

This count Orlok is a fuckin disgusting, feral beast with a sexual appetite stronger than death, an obsessive lust that never betrays any empathy behind the desire itself of this cursed cadaver and whoever is unfortunate enought to be in its path to obtain it.

I mean, it sounds like an obvious perfect match of a movie to (re)do for a renowed director that specializes in bleak gothic horror thrillers, and i’m just gonna cut the shit, Nosferatu lives up to the high expectations it reasonably fostered since it was announced, in pretty much every regard, and yes, the amazing cast features yet again William Dafoe (and a great Nicholas Hoult) after The Lighthouse.

Intense, repulsive and beautifully bleak, an amazing film and a great remake as well.

Highly recommended.

Final Verdict: Java

12 Days Of Dino Dicember #42: Caveman (1981)

Ah yes, the caveman movie with Ringo Starr, that was a thing, and honestly anything with actors or people that are actually known in the wider sphere of interests… it’s a welcome break from a lot cheap ass dinosaur flicks done with nobodies and with the cash of a ham sandwich, i’ve said this before but i’ll repeat myself since the 30 cents trash is by far the more numerically abudant.

Especially as it’s kind of ambitious for what’s conceptually just another cavemen comedy, as the main appeal is the cast, with Ringo Starr, Dennis Quaid, Barbara Bach, but it’s almost completely recited in “caveman language”, and in some theathers they even gave out a translation phamplet for 30 words in caveman lingo, which isn’t a complete gimmick since there is a sort of caveman dialect-vocabulary that’s recurring through the film, so no subtitles will ever be needed to watch it.

There is a plot of sorts, with Atouk, a caveman a bit too thinky and curious for its tribe, getting kicked out and joining a merry band of outcast cavemen, and with them they basically go on to improve themselves, invent fire, weapons, learn to walk not hunched like a baboon, all that stuff.

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12 Days Of Dino Dicember #37: Two Lost Worlds (1951)

h boy, two lost worlds for the price of one?

Sign me up for one ticket, Jimmy boy, because you know a movie it’s good when it marketed the same way as grocery store coupon for breakfast cereals or boxes of cuetips.

It’s kinda funny too how curiously there wasn’t a Lost World adaptation (talking about the Conan Doyle book, obviously) in the 50s, so i guess, just in case, they doubled the worlds lost, just to give you more bang for your buck, or make you believe that only to get suckered into watching a dinosaur film that couldn’t even afford its own dinosaurs.

Leaving aside the dinosaurs/reptiles don’t show up until 45 minutes into this… 61 minutes film, this in independent production that literally borrows his dinosaur footage from One Million B.C., the 1940 film that will end up being mined of its of stock footage for decades, as in used not a quick reference to the olden days, just ripped off because they couldn’t afford the special effects for the prehistoric creatures they wanted to as a selling point on the poster.

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[EXPRESSO] The Tunnel to Summer, the Exit of Goodbyes (2022) | Leaving Me Here On My Own

So, cinemas here decided to basically shadowdrop for a 3 days only event release this 2022 anime film, sandwiched between two huge summer promo, and i feel kinda bad for the timing because it’s a Shinkai-inspired romance anime with time travel elements, based on a novel of the same name, and it’s kind of a surprise, despite the premise sounding maybe a bit too familiar/overdone.

The movie tells the tale of a boy, Kaoru, whom randomly stumbles upon the mysterious tunnel of Urashima, which – according to the local legend – is able to grant one’s desires in exchange for time, in Kaoru’s case his dead little sister Karen. Uncertain on what to do with this discovery, he’s egged on by the new transfer student that joined his class, Anzu, also a loner with a personal interest in bargaining for something by traversing the mystical tunnel….

Animation by studio CLAP (Pompo The Cinephile) is quite good, if “unremakarble” compared to the other big anime romance films with sci-fi/supernatural elements you’ll inevitably compare this movie to, because – despite some unexpected or non banal revelations later on – you have simply seen this formula & platter of characters and plot beats done before, and it’s one of those cases where it’s almost good in spite of the its overly familiar elements… almost, in this case because while i enjoyed the more dry, less whimsical teen protagonists interactions, it’s a bit too dry where it could/should be some contrast, and it’s almost unintenionally funny how early they do the “moments together” flashback montage, kinda weird to have these pacing oddities in a movie that actually on the shorter side of the 90 minutes package.

It’s still better than i expected, definitely more than simply “decent”, but – again – not quite “good”.

[EXPRESSO] The Fall Guy (2024) | Project S

Apparently based on a 80s TV series of the same name i’ve never heard before, The Fall Guy is another in what seems to be a recent trend of meta comedies about movie making or the business of fiction breaking out in reality, with a dash of romance, so it’s this more Tropic Thunder or another send-off to Romancing The Stone?

A bit of both, but ultimately neither, as the story follows Colt Seavers, a stuntman that, after nearly dying on the set of a movie years ago, basically removed himself from the business even more as he had a romantic story budding with Jody, the film’s director.

Years later he’s called upon by Jody’s producer to help out with the stunts on her new movie and also locate the film’s douchey star actor, Tom Ryder, as he has been missing for days.

As Colt tries to win Jody back while also secretly attempting to find out where Tom could possibly be, he ends up meeting some thugs and finds out this isn’t some drunken debauchery joke or some movie star bullshit, but that there’s a conspiracy at play behinds the scenes….

i was expecting a decent flick and not much else, plus i was worried about the runtime, but there’s actually more to the plot to warrant the 2 hours lenght, the romance is cute, the lead actors’ chemistry is great, the action is deliciously over the top and satisfying compliments the comedy instead of using it a cushion, the characters are likeable, and it lovingly showcases the work of stuntmen/women and all the people in the biz whose glory is often left unsung.

A surprisingly good mainstream/general audiences movie, and one of the rare ones today that actually manages to deliver on the fabled “something for everyone” promise.

Vlad Love (2021) [REVIEW] | Oshii No Ko

You know an anime it’s gonna be special when Mamoru Oshii is directing and his own sales pitch fo r it is “you’ll see what an old man who doesn’t give any fucks can do” XD

Even more when he partners up with FLCL’s creator, for his first TV anime since his early days on working on Urutsei Yatsura and directing the series’ two feature films, meant to come out in 2020, but the project had some delays, and was eventually released during February of 2021 on Crunchyroll… well, half of it was released at once, in order to make a “broken heart” joke.

Actually, it’s more absurd i didn’t actually manage to review it at launch, but now the occasion-climate seem appropriate again, so let’s remedy to this and try to squeeze some “synergy juice” (or what’s left of it, since i was sick and had to delay this review).

I mean, he was clearly willing to get crazy and embrace its legacy in the most absurd – and memey – ways, like deciding to open the episodes with a mock version of the MGM logo sequence, of course replacing the lion with his beloved bassethound. XD He knows, but doesn’t care, love it.

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Girls Nite Out AKA The Scaremaker (1982) [REVIEW] | Bear Claws In

Would it really be September here without a school themed slasher from the 80s that has been mostly forgotten? Yep, there were so many of these that the “content vein” seems to never end, there’s always more slasher to pick and revaluate, here thanks to the UK (and also US) release on Blu-Ray by Arrow Video, who else?

I’m NOT gonna review the Blu-Ray itself and the many extra contents (especially if you managed to get your hands on the Limited Edition with the extra slipcase with the poster art of the movie under its alternative release date “The Scaremaker”), but i will say the 2K restoration it’s hella good.

I said school, but in this case we have a sorority group of college girls that are killed one by one by a degenerate in a bear costume (the college’ sport mascot) during a night-long scavenger hunt taking place on campus, with the story of a former student – called Dickie Canavaugh– that was recovered in a sanitarium and speculations on why he hanged himself.

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[EXPRESSO] Elemental (2023) | Avatar reference here

I’ll be honest: since the teaser trailer i had very low expectations for Elemental, and frankly the marketing didn’t make it any better, as it either led you to believe that this is Zootropolis again, but with the themes of racial prejudice and coexistence made even more ouvert by just making the elements people. And it’s also a simplistic. gimmicky variation on Romeo and Juliet.

And while there is some truth to those assumptions…. to be honest, this is far from the worse or insipid we’ve seen from Pixar lately.

For example, it’s mostly a story about first generation immigrants (Korean immigrants, as it’s a personal story for the director himself), a couple of “fire people” moving to Element City, and her daughter, Ember, divided between inheriting the store of her parents, who worked themselves to the bone, and following her passion and potential career, with the disruptive force igniting all this being a water guy, Dave, a safety inspector whom accidentally enters the shop, finds and reports the many safety violations, but then wants to help Ember avoid the city shutting down the store, and eventually they fall in love as they get to know each other.

It’s fun, quite pleasing, the romance it’s not original but it’s cute enough, Elemental it’s a decent film overall, but it’s also indicative of the troubled state of Pixar, as they exhaust their formula to the point the criticisms stopped being hyperboles and became truths, the whole concept is overly simple to the point it hurts its own worldbuilding and almost completely undermines its own themes, the premise is Zootropolis but the racism allegory makes even less sense in context, and while the character are fun and the animation is impressive as expected… we have seen this done better countless times before.

[EXPRESSO] Dalìland (2022) | Surrealist of The Nth Dimension

A Salvador Dalì biopic by the director of American Psycho, why did i almost miss it?

Well, there’s actually a reason that this one didn’t make much waves, as it’s a surprisingly by the numbers, skin-deep biopic about Dalì’s later years.

Set primarly in 1973’s New York, the plot follows a young gallery intern, James, who gets to moonlight as an assistant in order to motivate and ensure Dalì will produce new paintings for a new collection, which lets him see the man behind the artist, one broken by a constant fear of looming death, his excessive lifestyle that drains him in both the lifeforce and the wallet, his tormented relationship with his wife Gala, plus his Parkinson growing worse and limiting his art as well.

It’s not a bad movie, Ben Kingsley as Dalì alone saves it from being terrible or whatever, but it feels like its going through the paces, not actually interested in trying to also explain (or even depict) Dalì’s art in correlation to anything, which is reasonable since his work is far from being unseen niche stuff, but it also seems extra irrelevant, even more since there’s barely any character that feel properly nourished, or – so to say – “real”.

Plus the final act seems in a sudden rush, for whatever reason now events that would have been given entire scenes minutes before….are not, so you get the cliffnotes for important character’s life events, maybe there would have been time if the movie didn’t almost spent more time fleshing out the audience surrogate character instead of Dalì or where Alice Cooper listens to Ted Neeley spell out he was the protagonist in Jesus Christ Superstar.

It’s a mediocre, run-of-the-mill biopic, but it’s watchable, arguably inoffensive as well… which is kinda depressing in a way.

[EXPRESSO] Alice, Darling (2022) | “The Truth Goes Unspoken”

As with most releases that distributors are afraid won’t do well, i had to catch this one in theathers not even a week after it was out, quickly before the week’s new releases would inevitably push it out of the schedule altogether, we gotta make space for a russo-hungarian cheap looking animated kids movie about a fuckin rat.

And i’m glad i did, because Alice, Darling tells the story of a woman in an abusive relationship, Alice (Anna Kendrick), that decides to go with her friends to celebrate one of them hitting the 30s, but to do so lies to her strange fianceè because she’s afraid of what he might say or do if he finds out. Or more likely when he finds out, as we slowly learn the kind of abusive, manipulating piece of shit he is, as Alice manages to eventually confront and escape from his web of calculated guilt tripping ways, and her friends also become aware of the situation, feeling like they could have done something better if they actually knew a long time ago.

What is notable is that despite the trailer (or the tags for the review, for that matter), Alice, Darling doesn’t have a “hook” in the way of epitomizing this via a horror or otherwise explicit and graphic angle. This is a slow burner without exploitation style trappings, the psychological abuse and violence is comunicated mostly visually, through timely silences, implications, the poignancy in the unsaid, and there’s no deliberaly exaggerated “setpiece”, as the movie depicts with success the many little things that seem innocuous or benign because the abused has accepted them as the new de facto normality, how they creep slowly over time unquestioned and can fester into a person.

A very solid, worthwhile feature debut for director Mary Nighy.