2020 was one hell of a year, and homegrown filmakers pumping out shark movies like these didn’t help the situation. Especially if this one was actually finished in 2017 (to ride on the gravy train of Oujia: Origin Of Evil, released in 2016 as the prequel to the 2014’s film Oujia), but wasn’t released for 2/3 years, that’s the mark of quality if i’ve ever saw one. I mean, this isn’t an exception to the rule like Death Bed: The Bed That Eats, which undeservedly sat unreleased for 3 decades.
Yeah, let’s end the month on something extra tacky and cheap, but let’s give Mark Polonia a deserved rest, since we have Brett Kelly directing this one, using the age old trick of using a pseudonym, “Scott Patrick”, and it’s not the only time he used this specific one.
Why bother in the internet age i don’t know, but i guess it’s tradition, after all.
Yep, the director of fan-unfavourites like Jurassic Shark and its quasi-sequel Raiders Of The Lost Shark, which we previously covered before. And a bunch of mockbusters of the 1st MCU cycle, alongside something called She-Rex. Hmmm! takes note
Continua a leggere “Oujia Shark (2020) [REVIEW] #sharksncrocs”
Since i couldn’t find the 2017’s Land Shark (not the chinese one we reviewed last year), let’s pick something a bit more recent from the output of Mark Polonia that also almost makes want to revisit and review Shark Exorcist… again. I still don’t want to.
So let us bask in the nourishing homemade waters of Noah’s Shark.
It was either that or “Jurassic Shark 2: Aquapocalypse”, also by Mark Polonia and released in 2021.
Banger of a title, perfect bait for both the naive and the connosseur of “no budget homegrown cinema” that dares challenge audiences with crappy stopmotion dinosaurs and papermaciè sharks.
But still, even in this tier of poverty filmaking we’ve seen worse.
Continua a leggere “Noah’s Shark (2021) [REVIEW] #sharksncrocs”
While i promised myself i wouldn’t review stuff like the Corona Zombies films (made DURING the height of the pandemic in 2020 by an even more more shameless and cynical Full Moon Pictures)… i still will pretend they didn’t actually happen, alongside stuff like Angry Asian Murder Hornets, but chance and curiosity took the best of me when i stumbled upon this movie while walking down the river. I figured i could at least use it for this year’s Shark Month, and i selected it for the title alone.
So color me…. not really surprised when i actually started doing some research and finding out it’s yet another Polonia Bros joint.
And no, i didn’t plan out to review so many of their movies, at all. It just sorta happened.
At least they waited until 2021 came around instead of shooting it 3 days during mid-2020 so it could be “shot” and released during the height of the pandemic?
Continua a leggere “Virus Shark (2021) [REVIEW] | Bad Taste Sharks”