Pinocchi-O-Rama #12: OcchioPinocchio (1994)

Pinocchi-O-Rama comes to an end with a movie that will absolutely say nothing to anyone outside of Italy, despite being technically released in the US i seriously doubt there’s a solid stratum of english language coverage on OcchioPinocchio, which isn’t surprising since in time the film has not gotten much of a revaluation, heck quite the opposite, even by people that discovered it unaware of its messy production history or the figure of Tuscanian comedian and director Francesco Nuti.

While i’m not gonna over how a primer of Nuti’s work as there’s no time and i’m far from the right person for the job, the movie itself did hit all the snags while in production, expected to be in theather for Christmas 1993, shot in Texas and Louisiana, nowhere ready by the expected date, with a budget of 13 millions (pretty luscious for an Italian production at the time) that, due to the death of one of the distributor’s namesake founders, balooned to 25-30 millions.

Worse, as the dwindling relationship between Nuti and the production company had the set being stripped, he eventually had to sue the producer to try and make shooting proceed, which didn’t stop Nuti having to fork out 2 millions out of his own pocket to get the thing done and released by 1994.

All for a movie that basically nuked any goodwill and expectations left for Nuti as a creator, not only marking his creative crisis but also being a huge flop, bringing in 5 millions in box office.

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Pinocchi-O-Rama #11: Pinocchio AKA The Erotic Adventures Of Pinocchio (1971)

If you go to the Wikipedia page for the original Pinocchio book, you will notice many entries in the Films and Related sections.

As the time of writing, there’s a notable omission, as in, The Erotic Adventures Of Pinocchio, made in 1971, directed by Corey Allen, one that i swore was in the Wikipedia page before, and one i knew about long before Wikipedia was even a thing.

One that i knew will have to eventually be featured here, and as much i pushed it back down the list for Pinocchiorama… i don’t wanna talk about it around Christmas (and/or equivalent festivies), and i promised some variety to this retrospective, so time to get soft… core.

I mean, let’s get this clear right away: this is a soft-core porn parody of Pinocchio, one that was bound to eventually exist anyway due to the character phallicular nosejobbery.

On the flipside, i don’t have to worry about blackboxing any of the screenshots, so…

For various reasons, one would expect what’s basically a porno spoof to reinvent the original material in a comedic und sexual fashion, though “reinvent” implies a level of creativity that might be a little above crap like Gums, the bar isn’t much higher but we can get lower, down to the abyss of the Super Hornio Bros movies (yes plural) or stuff that the Cinema Snob has reviewed in bucket loads, gaining the unenviable nightmares of a female ET or the cardiatic arrest of a Strokemon.

Knowledge isn’t always benevolent, after all, hopefully the aforementioned paragraph does not trigger any ‘Nam flashback in you, or sparks some morbose tendency.

Who can really say….

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Pinocchi-O-Rama #10: Pinocchio’s Revenge AKA Bad Pinocchio (1996)

This is one i KNEW would have to be featured on Pinocchiorama from the very start, because it’s both peculiar but also really easy to see why it keeps slipping back into obscurity regardless.

After all, you gotta love the more common name this movie (also known as Bad Pinocchio) goes by, Pinocchio’s Revenge, which really tells you the kind of shit you’re about to see.

It’s that kind of stupid title that already confuses you, as in, who the hell could be Pinocchio be taking revengeance on? The Cat and Fox either get arrested, punished or get actually miserable endings regardless of what version or adaption of the story, Lampwick dies of being worked to death as a donkey, so to whom he has to break the rules of nature?

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[EXPRESSO] Inu Oh (2022) | Rock The Biwa

Masaaki Yuasa is back in cinemas after 2019’s Ride Your Wave, as in it finally hit theathers here, and this time he’s ready to bring in a tale of Heike era Japan’s Sergent Pepper Magical Mystery Tour, minus the Earth Wind And Fire collab and the quest for the musical instruments, but with fantasy elements set to blow the minds of the 14th centhury Japan’s musical scene.

Set in ye old medieval Japan, the movie follows the friendship of a blind musician Tomona, and a physically deformed dancer that calls himself Inu Oh (“Dog King”), as they travel through the Ashigaka era, performing in an odd troupe and rising to fame to their artistical prowess, despite them being ostracized by society for their appearances and differences..

It’s a fantastic and creative take on jidai-geki narrative, posing the question of what would it be if a rock n roll revolution swept through 14th centhury japan, with the protagonists not only expressing themselves though fame and success, but also being literal mediums of ghosts from the Heike era that just want their stories told, to be heard, even if they don’t belong in the approved history chronicles the government is redacting and enforcing for the sake of unification.

It’s a beatifully, psychedelic animation musical that pays homage to classic rock music but doesn’t just pay lip service through the surreal and stylish visuals Yuasa is known for (handled masterfully by Science Saru), the amazing musical numbers as they retell the stories of spirits that history forgot, an ode to the ones on the margin, the rejects, the exponged, and how despite everything, someone will come to give them a voice, to tell their tales through the power of art.

All in a packed yet concise 100 minutes runtime.

A masterpiece, highly recommended.

[EXPRESSO] A Haunting In Venice (2023) | Halloween Party

The adventures of world renowed french master detective Hercules Poirot continue in the new installment of Brannagh’ series of Agatha Christie adaptations, with Haunting In Venice.

Retired from the world and any kind of detective work in the town of the real “Aqua Laguna” after the events from Death On The Nile, Poirot just passes his days in slovenly eating italian pastries and avoiding any case, he is eventually roped in by an old time acquaintance of here, a detective novelist that based her books on him, as she wants to join a seance during Halloween in one of the many supposedly haunted Venetian houses, and discredit the medium as a phony.

Things go south quick as first someone attempts to murder Poirot himself, then theathrically kills the medium, forcing our mustache-armed detective to lock up the place and discover the murdered before the police can arrive, with events making him even – maybe – consider that the rumors of haunted buildings and lore of a horrifying children asylum have a modicum of truth to them…

It’s pretty decent, like the previous Kenneth Branagh Poirot films, i wasn’t quite woved, but i did quite enjoy them, and i did like this one a bit better than Death On The Nile, mostly due to the less sprawling script that doesn’t feel the need to add shit like the “WWI prologue for the ‘stache”.

But on the other hand the flirting with the horror elements this entry does… it’s just that, some mild flirting with the ideas of ghosts, just about as committed as it could ever realistically be given it’s an Agatha Christie’s story and whatnot.

Also, characters and story are less detailed and interesting this time around, but overall it’s a decent time, thought not really scary or super enthralling.

Pinocchi-O-Rama #9: The Adventures Of Buratino (1975)

For this month’s issue of Pinocchi-O-Rama, we’re going back to a “combo mix” of sorts.

We’ve seen live action adaptations, we’ve seen adaptations of the russian version of the novel, The Adventures Of Buratino/The Golden Key, we’ve seen musical adaptations.

So yeah, time to squish them all together for this 1975’s forgotten cult classic Soviet live action children musical TV movie adaptation of Buratino/Pinocchio shenanigans, made by Belarusfilm and released as a 2-parter, because media trends are cyclical after all.

Thankfully there’s no waiting for the climax as it’s almost a 50 yo adaptation, a fairly obscure one that thankfully can be found with hardcoded english subtitles on Youtube (fittingly spit in 2 parts, as well), and at the time of posting still is.

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[EXPRESSO] Lonely Castle In The Mirror (2022) | Castle Club

The more recent movie from Keichii Hara (Colorful, Miss Hokusai, Summer Days With Coo, various Crayon Shin Chan movies), finally getting a limited theatherical release here.

The premise see a shy outcast girl, Kokoro, that one days sees the mirror in her room glow, only to be magically drawn into a fantasy castle, where other six teens like her where also invited. A mysterious girl in a wolf mask tells them that if they find the key hidden in the castle, one can get its greatest wish granted.

Though, anyone that breaks the rules of the castle will get eaten by a wolf.

Lonely Castle In The Mirror is what i would describe as an incredibly, slow, SLOW burner that hinges on the third act twist and the revelations it holds to make it all worthwhile, and actually DOES fixes issues you’ve might had, as initially less interesting or banal elements of the plot gain new meaning, and characters actually becoming complete as we learn their whole story and their role in the “grand scheme”.

Animation aside, which is fine but also kinda unremarkable, especially for a feature lenght.

Also, while the ending is fairly powerful and the third act elevates the movie, it doesn’t fix the fact you still have to sit though some mild teen anime school melodrama about characters that feel relatable but not really interesting, wondering why even have fantasy elements at all, and having to contend with what – initially- feels like a direction-less stroll.

Even with these flaws, the ending serves perfectly the exploration of themes such as teen isolation, bullying, escapism and trauma, makes all plot threads and character arc collide and complete, and does pack quite the emotional – and througly earned – punch.

Definitely worth a watch, at the very least.

Pinocchi-O-Rama #8: Pinocchio AKA The Adventures Of Pinocchio (1911)

For the record, i absolutely detest how more than 60% (to be kind) of these Pinocchio adaptations are often called or retitled for international releases as “The Adventures Of Pinocchio”.

I get why, but still, at least opt for simply “Pinocchio”, makes it easier to search for even if we still have to put the decade after the title to avoid confusion, not that it would help too much because “Pinocchio (’11)” we’re talking about today was not made in “2011”, but the other “’11”, as in 1911.

We’re going back in time as hard as we can this time, since this is the very first movie adaptation of Collodi’s novel, an italian production as one could assume, and given its 112 years old, its no wonder it has been considered a lost film for decades, then in 1994 a negative was found, a 30-minute version resurfaced in 2022, and in 2018 we got a 50 minute version restored in 2K from the original negative with more footage taken from a positive nitrate copy and another negative (with different color tints), now both stored in a national Italian cinema archive.

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Pinocchi-O-Rama #7: Gepetto (Manwha)

If we’re talking about comics, we all known where Pinocchio comes to mind, though indirectly, as “The God Of Manga” Osamu Tezuka was inspired by Disney’s adaptation of Carlo Collodi’s book, and wanted to create a “reverse 21th Centhury Pinocchio”, a robotic boy already created to be as close as possible to perfection. I really don’t need to introduce Astro Boy, do i?

Tezuka would eventually do his own manga adaptation of Pinocchio, which would be interesting, but maybe too obvious, so we’re not reviewing that or Astro Boy.

Nope, we’re going for something far more recent, and pay visit to what i feel it’s an underestimated country in terms of comics, South Korea, that while it did get inspired by Japan’s anime/manga style and legacy, managed to create something distinct or similar but possessing its own personality and soul, dubbed as “manwha” for shorthand.

Though one could be forgiven to think that mostly it’s a matter of where its coming from instead of the content itself, given we had many distincly “manga” series come out from european or non-japanese artists (an easy example is Tony Valente’s Radiant), and the more successful/publicized often are aimed to the same age demographic as shonen mangas, or belong to popular genre trends.

But for each “God Of High School”, we have more unique work, like Hyung Min-woo’s western horror themed Priest, inspired by Monolith Productions FPS game BLOOD.

While a number of manwha series were and are given print editions in many countries (including Italy and France), the most common way to consume and access manwha in both its country of origin and international is “the internetz” and sites like Webtoon.

And indeed one can read the entire manwha we’re talking about today, Gepetto by Jewon Yeon, english translated on Webtoon, for free.

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