[EXPRESSO] Eddington (2025) | Divide Schmivide

Ari Aster doing a COVID-19 crime western comedy thing?

Sign me in!

Set during the 2020 pandemic, we see the local sheriff (played by Joaquin Phoenix) of the small town of of Eddington, New Mexico, get spiffy against the local mayor (played by Pedro Pascal) for the mask mandate, and it escalates to the sheriff deciding to run for mayor himself, sabotage his rival on social media, while the climate gets worse due to events such as the George Floyd’s murder, etc.

I will respect that Aster doesn’t give a shit about making movies that unearth a recent, hugely divisive period of reality people would rather move on from, and yes, this is a cornucopia of deliberately unlikeable characters, from Q-anon pilled conspiracy theorists in-laws, hypocritical liberal youths into activism as long as there’s some pussy to gain from it, cult leaders, grifters, etc.

Problem is, it’s an unfocused mess which satirizes everything but does so in such a shallow and frankly unsatisfying manner, regurgitating stuff we already know and are still living through, with barely a plot to hold onto, something to actually build to, or characters that actually have any depth, feeling even more cartoonishly stupid than they’re meant to, and somehow able to make actors like Pascal and Phoenix come off as bad, which is sadly impressive.

It’s more frustrating than anything else, as the actual jokes that work are too few and far between for an almost 3 hours long movie, and while it picks up a little midway through, it borders on being an completely boring, unfunny movie.

It all feels like an uncomfortable but also flavourless remasticated portrait of 2020 and today’s America; plus, while i did suggest it might take some time to revaluate Beau Is Afraid…. i’m not so sure about Eddington.

[EXPRESSO] Dangerous Animals (2025) | Three On A Sharkhook

New shark movie with a big budget, a widespread cinematic release and it’s not a Jason Staham trashfest romp, another gonzo shark movie about an Esper Shark (TM) or something done with lunch money-allowance budget?

What has the gone world to?

Apparantly something good and conceptually simple, i guess that’s why it took so long for someone to make a good shark movie that also plays the “Uno reverse” card on the concept without overcomplicating it or being outlandish.

Meaning that Dangerous Animals is about a serial killer that hides his murderous calling by posing as a shark cage experience activity for tourist in Australia (which fittingly all good modern shark movies seem to hail from), killing people and filming as he feeds them to the sharks.

His next victim is a surfer girl, Zephyr, living a nomadic sort of lifestyle, whom finds herself kidnapped by the killer in preparation for his macabre rituals…

it’s so simple that a shark movie like this hasn’t been made before, but on the flipside it’s actually pretty good, thanks to a good budget, very solid acting and good characters, with a resilient leading lady/final girl and a good psychotic villain that does have a humourous side that actually makes him more believable as he use it alongside some charm to better camouflage his true self, without going overboard and making him feel cartoony or excessive.

It’s also pretty gory without going into full splatter territory, going for a more realistic tone to the chases and attempts of his victims to escape his grasp, making for a very tense film that is less predictable than one would expect, yet very satisfying even when it hits the expected notes, one also basically devoid of filler, exactly as long as it needs.

Pretty good.

Maneater (2022) [REVIEW] | #sharkapalooza

Some “fresh” meat from…. 3 years ago. Yum.

Another one i randomly bought new for cheap on DVD via Amazon, sight unseen, because my hunger for shark movies it’s apparently endless.

Written and directed by Justin Lee, Maneater’s plot is pretty much the usual affair when talking modern shark movies: a group of friends go on vacation, board a boat that brings them to a remote deserted island where to get their party on, shark happens and it’s one that developed a knack (leave Mark Cerny alone) for human flesh.

This time we don’t have teens, but people in the 30s that have been married or just concluded a long education path, which is something different, i guess, especially since the movie doesn’t have the asshole that fucks everything that moves, or cheating bullshit to pad out the human drama parts, with a subplot involving an old fisherman that harbours vengeance as great white sharks took not only his wife but also recently his daughter.

Continua a leggere

[EXPRESSO] The Legend Of Ochi (2025) | Monkey Goblins Go Home

You know what, i’m not that surprised that the best A24 distributed film i’ve seen this year is an adventure family film (yeah, from A24), and not another half baked ramshackled “eat the rich” horror film for the pile, it’s something different, and honestly i was intrigued since the trailer.

Set in a little secluded rural island in Carpathia, Legend Of Ochi tells the story of Yuri, a farm girl that has been taught since little to not go out after curfew, as the woods not only hide bears and wolves, but a weird type of monkey-ish looking creatures dubbed “Ochi”, that the children are taught to fear, with her father even training the local children to hunt the Ochi.

But when one days Yuri find an injured child Ochi, she brings it along with her and goes on an adventure to bring it back home to its kin and – mostly – its family..

It’s a family film that harkens back to the 80s strand, especially Spielberg’s, but also The Dark Crystal, The Goonies, has definitely some recognizable “80s DNA” all around, BUT it also manages to make it all feel fresh, as it’s not a vision enslaved to blindly recreate those movies, the template it’s familiar and predictable, but the lore and the style is unique enough to set it apart from another cynical attempt at milking the 80s nostalgia cow it sounds like.

It’s beautifully shot and presented very well, it’s not padded at all, and honestly i was beyond impressed by the effects for the Ochi creatures, as there’s allegedly not an ounce of CGI, it’s just puppetry, god-tier puppetry that it actually makes one genuinely wonder “how they do that?”, capturing the often fabled feeling “movie magic”.

That alone is already a miracle in itself.

[EXPRESSO] Andy Warhol: American Dream (2023) | Byzantine Soup

Released just now here as 2 days limited event screening, i decided to give Andy Warhol: American Dream, this fairly recent documentary about the famous artist Andy Warhol (as it makes sense to when you put his name in the title), even though i don’t really like his works or style, personally.

I don’t hate him, his works or the impact he had on popular culture and art alike, btw, i just am not really a fan, but i will say this is a better film than expected, as instead of just going through the stuff most people already know… it does eventually get to that, but alongside various critic figures, museum curators and experts chiming in, it mostly dwelves into the aspect Warhol himself avoided discussing: his roots.

Which in this case is being the son of Rusyns immigrants from Slovakia, ailing from a small rural village observing the religious traditions of the Svolak Greek Catholic Church, travelling to the United States as many others did to seek that fabled “American Dream” of a better life, with Andy being the youngest of 4 siblings, and this documentary puts big emphasis on his family and friends, as they are the main narrators-actors telling about Andy, his early life, the familial ties to his homeland, how they perceived them there in Slovakia, giving also more intimate stories revolving around the well know events of his life and carrer, from his Campbell soup paintings, his celebrity portraits, the Factory, his films, him getting shot, etc.

I think it could have been edited better (as at times the movie repeats itself) and since it’s not dubbed (some people talk in english, most in Slovakian)…. the color choice for the subs is kinda infortunate at times, but still, a nice surprise worth seeing.

[EXPRESSO] The Brutalist (2024) | Nathan Explosion approved

For the prequel of Turtles In Time, there’s a distint lack of ninja turtles, flying brains, robot mice or mutants.

Guess we’ll see them in Part 2, as for Part 1 of The Brutalist the Statue Of Liberty is still there, “welcoming” the protagonist, Laszlo Toth, a Jewish Holocaust survivor and master architect that manages to immigrate from the United States but struggles to realize himself, until a wealthy client changes his fortune, even to spark hope he can reunite with his wife and family, whom he had to left in Europe….

Direct by Brady Corbet (Vox Lux, Childhood Of A Leader) might not be historically accurate, as Laszlo Toth searches bring up a geologist, while we have more of Ayn Rand inspired character, but in any other aspect it definitely lives up to the reception it’s gotten, and to the style of architecture it names itself after, because it is the history of a crossed, tormented, obsessed wreck of a man that its willing to go any lenght for its art, eccentric yet utterly flawed as any of his friends, loved ones and “antagonists” standing between his work, punctuated by the realities of immigration in the US, historical and religious events like the state of Israel’s foundation.

The fact alone the drama is constantly gripping for a movie that’s 3 hours and 30 minutes long is a feat in itself… i mean, it is, but the acting is phenomenal, cinematography is excellent, characters are quite good and there’s a remarkable snazz to it, very stylish and it does earn the “epic” epithet it shoots for, outside of its massive lenght.

Speaking of, if you’re gonna make movies this long, yes, do like The Brutalist and bring back the planned intermission (and Vistavision, it’s has been a while, indeed), stat.

12 Days Of Dino Dicember #40: Planet Of Dinosaurs (1977)

Yep, without the “The”, because dinosaurs in space don’t need proper grammar or explanation.

More sci-fi dinos, but this time with more of a budget, kinda, thought it’s one of those cases where the movie just will never be able to live up properly to it’s theathrical poster, which i love, it’s such a perfect sum of late 70s/80s cheese that’s kinda glorious.

I’m not even kidding, that theatherical poster kicks ass, ironically or not, it does.

The movie is actually a fairly typical mash of sci-fi and dinosaur flicks, set in a generic “future” where space travel is a thing, with the crew of the starship Odyssey forced to crashland on a planet that looks a lot like Earth, despite being many light-years away, and a prehistoric sort of Earth, ruled and inhabited as it is by many kinds of dinosaur.

The surviving members, lead by Captain Lee, try to survive in the hope of being rescued, until they encounter a mighty Tyrannosaurus Rex, that proves to be a toughie, forcing them to find a way to kill it in order to survive on the planet.

Continua a leggere

[EXPRESSO] Speak No Evil (2024) | Discord The Demon Not

Sadly i was not able to see the 2022 Danish original before this one arrived in theathres, figures we don’t get that but the Blumhouse produced american remake , and with a trailer that basically gave everything away. So due to my circumstances, i will have to judge the movie on its own, assuming the original was most likely better. At least i paid less than 4 bucks for the ticket.

(seriously, we still doing these fucking American remakes of foreign horror films?)

The premise see a London dwelling American family vacationing in Italy bond with a british one (also with a kid that has problems), later accepting the british family invitation at their house for a weekend in the English countryside.

Things… are what they seem, trailer aside, you can tell there’s something weird with these people, with red flags more and more blatant, as the movie deliberately stretches credibility hard, of how stupid can these people get in spite of so many “heavy hints”.

All obviously to comment on how we bend ourselves to avoid conflict, about the overimportance given to manners over values. which is ironic because when the mask falls off and the british family goes full blown psycho, it makes like all the charade before kinda pointless, because it led exactly to what you’d expect, to something like The Strangers, but without having any twist, not doing anything clever with it, nor doing anything graphic at all, and overexplaining itself too many times.

There’s basically no scares because of these, but thanks to some strong performances, especially James McAvoy’s that basically salvages the whole thing, and a competent direction by James Watkins (The Lady In Black, Eden Lake),.it’s somehow just mediocre, if it didn’t have those it would crumble in complete subpar, untintentionally hilarious farce.

Shark! AKA Samuel Fuller’s Shark AKA 4 Bastardi Per Un Posto All’Inferno (1969) [REVIEW] | #thesharksix

You can hardly get any more basic with a title like “Shark!” (shouted, of course), so it’s no wonder it got mostly forgotten in time, its status as a pre-Jaws shark film not helping, hence leave it to the italian home video market to release under the title of “4 Bastards For A Place In Hell” (4 Bastardi Per Un Posto All’Inferno), far more eye-catching and way fuckin better than just “Shark (exclamation mark)” though making one expect to see a spaghetti western, because deception and bullshit was always the name of the game when localizing titles of movies here in Italy.

Though it also can be summed up as “the shark movie with Burt Reynolds in it”, as we have basically a shark-laden style “Treasure Of The Sierra Madre” plot as well, with the protagonist being a gunrunner that loses its cargo near a Sudanese harbor town, making him stuck there, until he’s hired by a woman to help a scientist raid a sunken ship in shark-infested waters for some.. “valuables”.

Pity is, he faces competition from other people hired to do the very same thing..

Not to be confused with 1975’s Shark Treasure by Cornel Wilde, also about a sunken treasure and criminals, and one that also publicized itself on the realism of the sharks in it, because… minds think alike, especially when you’re gonna cash into Jaws’ success.

Continua a leggere

[EXPRESSO] Kinds Of Kindness (2024) | R.F.M. Does The Yubi Yubi

Yorgos Lanthimos has been on a roll lately, i especially loved Poor Things, so i was looking forward to his new film, Kinds Of Kindness, even though i had qualms about it being a tryptic/anthology thing, even with the novel spin of the same actors playing different characters in each of the segments.

Then again, Lanthimos reunited with his longtime screenwriter Efthimis Filippou (Dogtooth, Alps, The Lobster, The Killing Of A Sacred Deer) for this one, so yes, i’m definitely game.

Despite the segments having oddly some very light continuity, this is mostly done for a comedic pay-off/joke, so we have a collection of stories about the titular types of “kindness”, with the first being about a man that falls of favor after refusing to cause an incident for his boss (that also monitors and basically plans/commands his subordinate entire life), the second with a cop that has her missing wife survive from a crash on an island and return unscathed, only for the cop to feel increasingly paranoid about the wife being an impostor, and the final one concering a couple of members of a cult in search of an actual holy maiden able to raise the dead for real.

It’s a bit uneven, with the middle segment arguably being the best one, and the final one being kinda disappointing (and structurally too similar to the first one, which is classic old school Lanthimos all the way), with the feeling it all might have worked better with some of the ideas reworked into a single storyline, especially with its being the longest of Lanthimos films, almost clocking at 3 hours.

Still, it’s definitely worth seeing, even with the slightly excessive lenght and uneven quality of the segments, the acting by the stellar cast it’s incredible as expected. Good stuff.