I.K.U. (2000) [REVIEW] | LGBT Robosexual Runner

While i most likely won’t be reviewing the new Wuthering Heights film adaptation, to prove my platonical love for you, the audience, i will review this film i found on DVD in a flea market, and no, it wasn’t on the porn section.

I know i had to get it, it was like, 5 bucks at max, and with a title that screams “CINEMA” as IKU gets a IGN certified “10 out of 10” just for reference-pun combo that is the subtitle “I, Robosex” added in the Italian DVD release.

Sometimes i get to find import DVD copies of weird state sponsored video art when i go thrifting, sometimes i pick up fully localized and officially distributed “technically not porn” like this.

So, the hell is this?

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[EXPRESSO] My Father’s Shadow (2025) | Abiola ’93

Presented as last year’s Cannes, My Father’s Shadow is one of those films that they sneakily released in theathers and i almost missed, which would have been a shame.

Though i understand there’s no point pushing to general audiences an UK-Nigerian coming-of-age story presented with subtitles only.

It is June 12th 1993, day of the presidential elections in Nigeria, and two young boys, Remi and Aki, are brought along to Lagos by their often absent father, Folarin, as he goes there to ask for months of unpaid salary to begin with, but decides to bring the boys along and – as he waits for the supervisor to come back later that night – have them seen some city life, relax at the beach, go to an amusement spark, spend some time with them.

The boys in turn get to see more him open up to them, but in the tense political atmosphere of the city (with military mowing in pre-emptively into town after denying a massacre happened some days prior) and eventual uprising due to the election failing, their father is suspected of subversive activities, making them question even more who he really is…

It’s a really good coming of age story that while is enhanced by taking place on the backdrop of a politically troubled piece of Nigerian history (which doesn’t narrow it down much, the more i think abourt it), it doesn’t use it as a “crutch” for the characters dynamics, and is a heartfelt drama about absent fathers with great characterization and terrific performances.

In spite of the predictable “revelation” at the end, it still lands quite the emotional punch, since the drama and characters are relatable but not banal, heavy but not sensationalized, making My Father’s Shadow an amazing debut film for director Akinola Davies Jr.

12 Days Of Dino Dicember #52: Baby: Secret Of The Lost Legend (1985)

Unlike the other 1985 film review for Dino Dicember this year, this one is indeed a proper dinosaur film, and one that does know the target demographic its going for, not that a title like “Baby The Lost Legend” would led to people assuming the opposite.

It’s also another dinosaur themed by Disney, this time under the Touchstone Films/Pictures label

like One Of Our Dinosaurs Is Missing, thought thankfully no “Yellow Peril” age chinese stereotypes, we’re moving to Africa as the movie premises involves a couple of archeologists trying to track down the local legendary monster known as mokele mobembe, whom happens to share many characteristics with sauropods, dinosaurs basically, leading the two to find a family of brontosauruses deep in the jungles of Congo.

The two are followed by the African military, which seems the dinosaurs as a potential treat and will have to escape them in order to save the baby and its parents as well…

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12 Days Of Dino December #51: Ice Road Terror (2011)

Another one that’s been long overdue, and not because of any specific reason, besides resulting absurdly elusive to find so far, outside of buying a used import DVD of it on Ebay, which was also unbelievably expensive, hence the post-poning until eventual availability.

That did came when i found the thing uploaded on Youtube in full some months ago, glad i didn’t blow 40 bucks or something on just the US DVD copy. Without the box.

Especially for what is literally just a random SyFy dinosaur movie, Ice Road Terror is nothing more than that, and in hindsight it might sound like a mockbuster of that Liam Neeson starring film, The Ice Road, but that came out a decade later, in 2021, the title of this – apparently – its meant to reference a TV series i’ve never heard before, called Ice Road Truckers.

This movie too is about “ice road truckers”, as in a couple of truckers that are driving through Alaska’s frozen rivers in order to deliver some equipment to a remote diamond mine in the region.

But on arrival they encountered a prehistoric creature that had been long dormant in the ice.

Typical.

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[EXPRESSO] Zootopia 2 (2025) | We Will Survive

I’ve been skipping most of Disney output of lately, Wish did reinforce this habit, but since i did like the first Zootopia and thought it was one of the best modern Disney films, i was planning on watching the sequel. So i did.

After a brief recap of the final twist and ending of the first movie (which is roughly “one child old” by now), Zootopia 2 follows up Nick and Judy’s unit, which is jeopardized due to them fumbling an operation and causing destruction in the wake of the city centennial, for which a book pivotal for the very foundation of Zootopia itself will be shown to the public.

But despite this, Judy finds proof of a reptile entire the city, which hasn’t happened in a centhury, and she investigates, her and Nick find themselves involved in another conspiracy, get framed and have to escape and get to the bottom of this mistery.

While it’s yet another conspiracy plot, we do get some solid worldbuilding, new characters and a solid villain, and we get to see more of this animal world and how it works beyond the big metropolis, as the sequel builds on the themes of racism, prejudice and discrimination with gentrification and (more) classism now, here done with the “reptile problem” and a political scheme about expanding biomes made for specific types of animals at the expense of others.

It does some of the typical Disney quirks plotwise, but it’s more the benign ones, these are not as bad as they could be, the new characters are fun, there is some sensibile development of the unusual cop buddy duo of Judy and Nick, there are some fun, quick references/nods for the older crowds, and overall it’s honestly a great sequel and a pretty good animated children film,

[EXPRESSO] One Battle After Another (2025) | Leonardo D. Caprio

While i would have been happy with Licorice Pizza being the last film of Paul Thomas Anderson… wait he did say he wasn’t planning to “do a Tarantino”, and even if he did it would have been hard to believe, as his new film, One Battle After Another, demonstrates.

Which is already a surprise as its not set in some past but in modern days… after starting in the 1980s by showing the freedom fighters-vigilantes calling themselves “The French 75” freeing a group of migrants, one of the being “Ghetto Pat” (DiCaprio) who’s trying to prove his worth to the crew with his explosive expertise, and gets together with the crew’s leader, “Perfidia Beverly Hills” (Teyana Taylor), whom in the operation holds hostage the camp’s commander, Sgt. Lockjaw (Sean Penn).

Later Perfidia and Pat do have a daughter, but Perfidia storms out and goes missing.

16 years later, Pat, now known as “Bob Ferguson”, is forced back into the revolutionary stuff as Lockjaw is back searching for him and his daughter with a PMC worth of forces, so “Bob” has to try and contact the “old band” to save his skin and his daughter… despite being so out of the loop, beyond “rusty”, as he forced to confront his past despite not being cut out for it, at all.

I mean, he’s manic, paranoid, and looks like The Dude if he was more of a mess in every regard, being so out of place, desperate and oddly – but fittingly – tangential in this humour crime comedy drama that is actually able to transition with effect from comedy delirium (there’s a cabal of Santa worshipping hyper racists in it, for once) and the grim, depressing reality of how the injustices keep repeating for the future generations.

A must see film.

Mario Kart World NSWITCH 2 [REVIEW] | Open Kart Policy

So, yep, this review is a bit late, but given there was no communicated immediate plans for their “content roadmap”, i feel what i have to say now would have applied at launch and might apply despite future updates, but we’ll see about that, though i don’t plan to update the review as they add stuff either as part of DLC expansions or free software updates.

I mean, i also didn’t plan to keep reviewing Pirate Warriors 4 DLC as i did, so time will tell, but as of now they haven’t hinted or said anything about what they plan to do with the title in the future, so here we go.

That said, i did play a good chunk of the game at launch, then i came back after DK Bananza to dig into the “open world-free roam” mode, play some online matches occasionally, and trying to have the RNG grant me the other hidden characters like mah boi Fish Bone.

More on that later.

Being the long awaited mainline installment into the Mario Kart series (i’m trying to scrub my memory of Mario Kart Tour and his “pipe titillation gacha”), technically Mario Kart 9, but i guess Nintendo doesn’t feel like numbering them for now, yeah, expectations were high and not much was known about it aside rumors of the game having an open world, until it was releaved some months before the Nintendo Switch 2 announcement, and then launched as THE launch game for the console, so much they make it a lot cheaper to get the digital copy included in the Switch 2 bundle, while the retail copy asked 90 bucks MSRP.

“Jesus”, indeed.

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[EXPRESSO] Locked (2025) | Small Theft Auto

Locked has a simple, yet fairly intriguing hook: a small time thief desperate for cash one day finds a strangely unlocked high-tech smartcar (like a Tesla that doesn’t randomly burst into fire) to loot it, but once in he then realizes he’s locked into the vehicle, and gets contacted by the owner, whom remotely controls everything in the car, making it act as a trap for whoever tried to steal it.

The guy then has to survive locked inside, while the unseen owner keeps torturing him, playing mind games and keeping the complex trap scenario of his own design going…

Sadly for Locked, this is the kind of script with a decent-good idea/concept…. but ultimately doesn’t really know what to do with it outside of slightly escalating the tortures, and boiling the explanation for this cruel trap to basically the same “eat the rich” surface level class warfare bit A24 movies have done to death recently, just done in a more utilitarian and even more shallow fashion, with the car owner (Anthony Hopkins) also written as being completely callous, a straight up empathy-free psycho, for better or worse.

It’s also not tense enough to make you question for real if escape is even possible to begin with, which is an issue (as is the unsatisfying ending) but i will say it’s not boring, even though it’s a film carried entirely by Bill Skarksgard’s performance as the low tier criminal that is forced by circumstance to thieve and such in order to care for his family, and if Hopkins kinda phones it in (literally for most of the film), he seems to be having fun with such a stock Jigsaw wannabe, which does help.

Overall, Locked feels middling, not bad but makes one wonder for the movie that could have been.

P.S.: This also is another foreign remake of a 2019 Argentinian movie called 4X4 (which has now has been remade thrice), itself having a similar premise to a 1998 direct-to-video film named Captured.

[EXPRESSO] Fantastic Four: First Steps (2025) | Freaks On A Leash

I didn’t see the 2015 reboot and i barely remember some things from the 2005 iteration (“no one” has seen the Roger Corman version so i’m not gonna ask), but i’d say fans of the Fantastic Four will be pleased with finally having a more than solid film made about the beloved superhero quartet.

It definitely helps that Fantastic Four: First Steps is basically a standalone entry, taking place in another version of Earth where everything is a retrofuturistic 60s space age utopia, and (like the recent Superman reboot) it skips doing the origin story and it starts with the team already established, with a ABC style show recapping how they got their powers and became the city heroes/guardians, mythologized and even with their own saturday morning cartoon.

It does indeed play heavily on the family angle, as Sue and Richard are to have a baby….a joy shortlived by the appearance of a female Silver Surfer announcing their planet will be destroyed by Galactus, prompting the team to go back to space and trying to resolve the situation, complicated by an odd proposition i won’t spoil…

Again, it does play his card sincerely (as did Gunn’s Superman, guess this is new style for comic book movies now), there’s space travel, a bit of fighting, and it’s definitely the best offering from Marvel in a while…. it’s simply not as good as the James Gunn’s Superman reboot that we saw just 2 weeks ago, but i can’t fault the movie for that.

I can fault it for the characterization being somewhat lacking, as the Fantastic Four come off – despite the great performances – as a bit too perfect, too easily accepted and with any rough edges or weirdness (mostly) sanded off, like their media image plastered on ads or products.

[EXPRESSO] 100 Liters Of Gold (2024) | Moonshine Madness

Finland (and Italy since it’s a Finnish-Italian coproduction) time for 100 Liters Of Gold, a comedy by Finnish director Teemu Nikki (Euthanizer, The Blind Man Did Not Want To See The Titanic, Death Is A Problem For The Living, about two sisters, Taina and Pirrko, that run a successful – yet seemingly illegal – brewery renowed for their “sahti”, a traditional kind of Finnish beer (usually done with homemade methods as a secular family activity), and do it extremely well.

Things go south when their third sister orders them 100 liters of sahti for her wedding, as a series of family issues and petty yet almost deadly rivarlies surface, alongside a series of infortunate events and their desire to taste the product lead the two to guzzle down the entire batch for the wedding, then having to scramble and fix the situation in time for the wedding..

It’s a slow burn, off beat comedy about family and alcoholism also big on black comedy and nonsense, since the two middle aged sisters won’t stop out of stealing from the dead (among other things) to get out of their predicament and keep the promise with her soon-to-be-married sister, whom also previously lost a leg in a car accident, making age old dysfunctional family issues bubble up for the event, leading to a surprisingly dramatic resolution.

I think it’s decent movie and far from boring, though it’s also strangely meandering after a point, and it’s not a case of having too little going on, there’s a lot but none it’s really properly explored/developer comedy or drama (ending aside) as it could – and should -, resulting in a duo of protagonists – and by extent the many foul things they do – that’s hard to properly care for, despite the talented lead actresses.