Pikmin 4 NSWITCH [REVIEW] | Enter The Dogbus

10 years after the last mainline game, the beloved Nintendo series about floral strategy and cutesy war PTSD is back with Pikmin 4 for Nintendo Switch, and i was even more eager to get my mittens on it after replaying for review & funsies Pikmin 3 in its Deluxe edition-port on Switch.

Who am i kidding, after devouring the demo, i was ravenous to get into the full game ASAP.

Story is fairly typical Pikmin, as in, you know the deal by now: people keep crashlanding on this damn planet. And by people i mean poor Olimar, that crashlanded on the planet, sent out a SOS call, but then the rescue team itself had troubles with the ship, so its up to you, as the new recruit of the Rescue Corps (an intergalactic rescue organization) and one of its few “non-scattered around” remaining members to get the whole crew back together, then find and save Olimar, whom also sent them various pages of its journal.

Someone seem confused in terms of when it happens, even confusing it for a reboot/remake of the first game’s story (i guess since Olimar here too used Pikmins to get back the scattered pieces of its rundown but beloved ship, the Dolphin)… dunno why, but yep, since Olimar and Louie are involved too, and we get the new group of cute potato aliens also discuss of Koppai, the planet from where the expedition group of Pikmin 3 came from to avoid famine, heck, even an inhabitant from that planet later becomes an important plot point.

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Jurassic Shark 2: Aquapocalypse (2021) [REVIEW] | Sequelgeddon #sharksncrocspartdeux

I eventually had to find out this existed, because words like “sequels” don’t mean anything anymore, even more when we dwelve in the “homegrown/DIY” territory of the shark movies, where one name echoes through the vast oceans, Mark Polonia, and he stands atop of his carboard throne, commanding beasts of papermaciè and plastic (and whatever the budget can afford) to fend off the rare adventurers setting off in the desperate quest for the homegrown crown.

So powerful he is that only he can received the task of doing a sequel of a low budget shark movie he didn’t originally make, as Jurassic Shark was directed and produced by Brett Kelly, but that isn’t even the stranger thing about Jurassic Shark 2: Aquapocalypse.

That would be this one standing as the “official” sequel, as Brett Kelly also directed Raiders Of The Lost Shark, which was a surprise kind of sequel to Jurassic Shark, as i discussed when reviewing it.

But this one gets to have the Jurassic Shark name and slap a 2 on the end, for whatever reason, and so it kinda surprising the plot has anything to do with the first, as the oil company from the first movie (whom accidentally released the megalodon) is back and wanting to drill for oil of the coast of Cat Island (not that one), and its up to the workers of the oil rig – that accidentally discover the beast – to try and save what they can from its unfeeling jaws… And its amazing inflatable fin.

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[EXPRESSO] Spider Man: Across The Spiderverse (2023) | Peter Parter

This review it’s only a formality, but yes, indeed, i had high expectations of this new Spider Man animated movie after Into The Spiderverse was a surprise smash hit, an unexpected excellent opus from an animation studio mostly known for Hotel Transylvania and The Angry Birds movie.

We never saw it coming, but it happened and while it had the side effect of making the live-action Marvel offerings kinda redundant and pointless, i would have been happy even if there wasn’t a sequel, despite being no reason to stop there, i mean, we got the new origin story/introduction of Miles Morales as one of the many Spider Man personas, the studio was gonna follow that up regardless.

This sequel to Into The Spiderverse also follows in the recent resurgence of “two parters” (giving even more proof that time is a flat circle, at least in terms of entertaiment media), and in this “part 1” we see Miles (and Gwen) venture deeper into the multiverse of various Spider personas from many dimensions/universes, meeting a new team of “Spidersonas” known as Spider Society, led by Miguel O’Hara (aka Spider Man 2099), but instead of collaborating they end up clashing in regards of how to deal with the villain at hand.

And honestly it meets the high expectations set by the previous movie, delivering a lot of inspired visuals, variety of animation styles and stylization, new charming and likable characters, plus the story dwelves deeper into the multiverse aspect, Miles’ role in this, so even if it ends on a cliffhanger for “part 2”, it’s not just 2 hours and 1/2 of setup, it’s already very very good as expected, and again it manages to make you really care even if you weren’t already much invested in Spiderman his many comic book incarnations/iterations.

[EXPRESSO] John Wick 4 (2023) | Knights Of The High Table

Wasn’t sure if to review this one, but i eventually watched the first John Wick on Netflix for the first time, so yeah, whatever, gonna marathon this series days before seeing the new one in theathers.

So apparently the series as a whole has people kinda divided, but honestly i’m not quite getting the confusion as even the first movie was chock full of ultra stylish ultra violent revengeance that drew from many influences, indeed was a revitalizing kick in the ghoulies for the action genre, and already seemed like it was the best adaptation of a violent cult comic book that never was.

For the 4^th outing, it’s no surprise we get even more focus on the mythology of the assassins’ codes and the rules of this world that invites the same questions as WH40K does (“who cooks the meals without being bound via a blood pact to some finger collecting mob boss, etc.”), as we continue to see John Wick take on the High Table itself, after basically declaring war against it before.

Honestly i like these movies and how they try to up the ante every time, but if John Wick 3 seemed a little longer than necessary, Chapter 4 might result as downright bloated, as it pushes for a nearly 3 hours runtime, and could have benefitted to trim some of its many spectacular fights that sometimes go on so long they kinda start to grate on the audience a bit.

But i can forgive the excess as there’s plenty of very good action, and the pretty satisfying ending making it clear this is the intended end of the franchise, so hoping they will just stick with the already planned spin-offs, i’d say John Wick 4 it’s indeed quite “the blast” to end the series with.

[EXPRESSO] Shazam: Fury Of The Gods (2023) | Atlantomachia

Superhero time again, this time of the DC Comics variety, with the sequel to 2019’s Shazam, which introduced new audiences to the magic-powered hero and its origin story, before we got a DC Extended Universe entry related with last year’s spin-off film about Shazam’s nemesis, Black Adam, but honestly i’d rather not discuss of that movie again, what’s the point since their MCU attempt was such a mess that they hired James Gunn as well to reboot the entire thing?

So, talking about Fury Of The Gods, we have our boy Billy Batson and his foster siblings having to face a new menace, the Daughters of Atlas (played by Lucy Liu and Helen Mirren), who have come to reclaim a world ending artifact.

As you can guess, thanks to the new foes we get the explore the lore a bit more, learning of the origin of their powers, the world of Greek gods long gone, which also means it’s a great “excuse” to have a pandemonium style of monsters from said mythology run amok, from cyclops to harpies and manticores, and like the first you can tell this is from a horror director, because a lot of people get straight up killed (or worse) even in the prologue.

I was very pleasantly surprised by the first Shazam movie, and this one it’s just as good, being also a n everincrensigly rare specimen of superhero movie that isn’t plagued by tonal issues, has genuinely funny comedy bits (and the style of writing fits more with the protagonists being young teens), and balances well all of the aforementioned with the more emotional moments, which do feel earnest and not just there because the template says so.

Third act could have been a lil’ shorter, but still, lots of silly but genuine fun.

[EXPRESSO] Ant-Man and The Wasp: Quantumania (2023) | King Kang

Ah yeah, the sequel to that one most people (me included, to be truthful) plain skipped, until they had to hurriedly watch it in order to follow whatever was gonna going on Quantumania.

I say this because i get the feeling many threat this series as “multiverse marmite”, a byproduct of this fucking decade long MCU plan, a lot more “skippable” than others, even if this is supposed to be the movie to kick off Phase 5, i had my expectations fairly low as expected by now, thanks to the evergrowing Marvel fatigue – itself tiresome to point out, even if it needs to be, as years of Marvel movies pile up – doesn’t help.

Anyway, this time Ant-Man and The Wasp….and basically the entire quantum scientist team get sucked into the Quantum Realm, which is quite different than before, housing a myriad of unknown species and races of humanoids, all theathrened by Kang The Conqueror, helped by his servant MODOK, and YES, the screenshots were right, he looks like he escaped from the music video of Peter Gabriel’s Steam, but then again, its a silly design, what the hell did you expect?

He’s actually kinda one of the best things about Quantumania, as the quantum world is very, VERY Star Wars-esque, the villain is decent but feels like purposefully underveloped for future MCU movies, the plot it’s so ironically tiny and feels tacked on (pun), direction is unremarkable, the cast seems to be kinda phoning it in (aside from Jonathan Majors as Kang), and action isn’t great, just incredibly average for these movies.

It’s okay, as in, it’s not boring, it has its moments but it’s just plain “mid”, fairly uninspired, and honestly the two previous Ant Man movies were better, smaller in scope but just more fun overall.

[EXPRESSO] Avatar: The Way Of The Water (2022) | Catboys Galore

In a way, i was looking forward to see this in theathers, as in i wanted to get this thing done and dealt with as soon as possible, so i could move on to far more interesting releases.

And watching the movie confirmed exactly what i feared/expected: another constipated public dump by James Cameron (of James Cameron fame) about space “non-native americans” tribal catboys that have to defend their land from the evil humans that want their planet and resources.

Set 10 years after the event of the first movie, Way Of Water introduces Jake’s family and their struggle to escape from an old enemy (returning into a Navi’ body), by leaving the jungles of Pandora and seek refuge into one of the water-dwelling tribes of Navi’.

Still a lot of vapid neo-age tribalistic mumbo jumbo bullshit designed to look pretty but with an artstyle derived from a mid 2000s “alien landscape wallpaper” search, be technically impressive but devoid of any substance that couldn’t be found into a 90’s kid movie about climate change, the character are mostly paper thin, by design too.

We gotta make room for all the other excesses that could have been cut from the movie, but let’s never explain some incredible shit that might actually need it, all made worse by an incredibly bloated and unwarranted runtime (for this theatrical cut) that goes BEYOND the 3 hours mark.

Still, despite all these issues, i gotta admit some of the new stuff it’s pretty cool (like the new robots/mechs), the movie delivers on the spectacle, there’s a lot of action, Cameron still knows how to direct some really fuckin cool action-combat scenes, and there’s enough to make it entertaining on a basic level, even if it IS cinematic constipation.

Not looking forward to the third one.

Dead Island Riptide (Definitive Edition) PS4 [REVIEW] | #deadislandretrospective

Aka the “actual” Dead Island 2, as time would eventually tell.

Technically not, but actually yes, since it’s developed by Techland and in terms of story it’s a direct sequel, following up immediatly (after a brief recap) where we left off that unremarkable (to be kind) narrative, which means the group of survivors gets aid by an american Navy ship but it’s immediatly captured by one of the side villains from the previous game, Serpo (guess Betraldo didn’t have the same ring to it), intenting of using their immune blood to concoct a cure and a weaponized bio weapon, or something. Doesn’t matter much, as you shipwreck into a nearby island in the archipelago, where the zombie epidemic has also spread after the incident in Banoi, and learn that they plan to nuke the entire island in order to contain the zombie plague.

Yeah, the story it’s about as crappy and easy to completely not give a shit about, with the obvious twists seen coming miles and miles away, but i’d argue it’s actually, objectively worse since there is barely a plot in Riptide, like, at all, aside from the beginning and ending, where a side character in the first game becomes the main antagonist… barely, so you can say this game does recycle too much from the first, even in this regard.

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[EXPRESSO] Knives Out: Glass Onion (2022) | Greece Getaway

Managed to catch this one in theathers during its premiere week, before it arrives on Netflix, as i planned to since i also saw the first movie in theathers.

This follow up arrives with some delay, as you could guess since the movie it’s set during full COVID-19 pandemic swing, not that it matters much outside of the intro part, which has world famous detective Benoit Blanc receiving the mysterious invitation (via a puzzle-operated special box delivered to him) to a secluded private island in Greece, where tech mogul is holding a private getaway with some of his old friends, inviting them to solve the mystery… of his own murder.

And before you go on a tangent, this was in the trailer and actually isn’t the big crux of the plot, at all, which indeed continues the type of comedy mistery affair that subverts or surprises the viewer by working with the classic elements of the murder mystery, the expectations it brings, while bringing in a new set of horrible people as potential suspects when the murders start happening, keeping the theme of “eating the rich and eat em hard” while delivering plenty of twists, reveals, laughs and damn satisfying bombast too, in some part.

There’s very little way to discuss the movie in any more detail without giving away or hinting at what actually happens in it, but i will say that this time Benoit Blanc it’s “proper” gay now.

Does it matter? Not really, as Bautista it’s playing a nerd streamer.

Now that i have distracted you, i can say that indeed Glass Onion it’s a pretty good follow up to the first movie, not a redo, but a new chapter/story, and i’m quite glad there will be more mysteries for Benoit Blanc to solve in the future.

[EXPRESSO] Diabolik 2: Ginko Attacks! (2022) | Color Cinecomic Photoplay

After the Diabolik revival movie of 2021 was surprisingly succesfull, we now have the sequel, Ginko Attacks, with inspector Ginko pressing its dogged hunt for master criminal Diabolik, managing to find its hidden lair, and eventually collaborating with a betrayed Eva Kant.

Though Diabolik himself was recast, here being played by Giacomo Gianniotti instead of Luca Marinelli from the 2019 movie.

As of why, Gianniotti does look almost identical to Diabolik as depicted in the original comics, but it’s a bad trade-off as Marinelli was by FAR a better actor, and a better Diabolik.

He doesn’t even feel like the same character either, but then again almost no character in Ginko Attacks has a semblance of personality, just existing as a barren narrative gear.

Cumbersome pacing (for a 2 hours and 20 minutes movie) doesn’t help, nor having Monica Bellucci in the cast.

Dialogues are pretty awful too, and tipify the whole problem with the movie, as it feels excessively faithful to the source material, making one wonder if they lifted the text verbatim from the comics, without ever considering how (or if) they would work in an actual film, or to actually update the literal decades old material for modern cinema standards.

So it’s no wonder the plot it’s also bad, utterly predictable from the get go regardless, with the twists/reveals actually making thing worse, because the entire narrative relies on almost every “character” being way too fuckin stupid to predict what the audience did hours ago.

Though it’s hard to get angry because it’s such an alienating, empty experience, with some style backed…by absolutely zero substance, and it’s very disappointing since the first movie was flawed, yes, but also WAY better.

So i’m not exactly looking forward to the third one already in the works.

Awful. Disappointingly awful.