[EXPRESSO] Avatar: Fire And Ash (2025) | Cigarette Butts

Here we are again.

Somehow “disappointed”.

Sound silly, i know, the second one was admittedly a bit better than i expected and had some surprises in there… this one having a new Nav’i tribe of brutal savages (just short of being cannibals) isn’t enough to stave off boredom, but then again plot comes third or fourth more than usual this time around, taking a backset for just repeating almost verbatim the same plot beats of Way Of The Water, with some extra piles of new stuff that conveniently happens just because the script needs to -once again – free from capture these dumbass characters.

It’s pointless to be angry about an Avatar movie being another pile of shallow, utter nonsense, but this time around is even more boring dull nonsense that goes for a 3 hours equivalent of jiggling keys to infants, and it has framerate issues, which i don’t remember being a thing when i watched Way Of The Water in theathers just 3 years ago.

Maybe i got lucky back then, but regardless of how it looks that way, it’s distracting since it often fluctuates from looking like a big budget cutscene of a videogame, looking like we’re a HD camera feed from the set, looking actually cinematic, and so on.

It’s just insanely distracting and the added motion smoothing almost gave me a headache, and mind you, this was for a 2D screening.

I was reminded of something actually borderline unwatchable, Resident Evil: The Final Chapter, but the sentiment is there, as i wonder why Cameron keeps making tech demo movies for proven tech (or telling a worthwhile plot with this astounding technological prowess), or he just doesn’t go make videogames instead.

Not that anything of this matters, as people will go see this on droves anyway.

[EXPRESSO] The Thing With Feathers (2025) | Corvus Surplus

At first i thought this was the marketing trying to trojan horse this Benedict Cumberbatch movie as a horror film when in reality it was a thriller or something… and i almost wish it was the case.

Based on the short novella “Grief Is The Thing With Feathers” by Max Porter, this movie adaptation sees a recently widowed husband, left to raise his two kids after his wife suddendly passes away, and he has a breakdown, leading to him allucinating the giant crow-man from his drawings (he works as an illustrator for children books), which starts mocking his anguish but eventually become visible to his children too, and an oddly supportive force there to help the family move past their loss.

It’s like a benign take on Babadook, yet again, but the problem is that the film, despite good intentions and Cumberbatch trying his best, the characters and grief drama are so overdone, one note, and it being a horror does not help the concept, since it just goes for some cliched, cheap visuals and ill-fitting jumpscares, just a mesh of horror elements as token as the grief drama ones.

On one hand, i do like the scenes with the giant crowman, i do, even if just for visual entertaiment, since they do undermine any attempt at making the drama itself work, but on the other hand, the drama is undercooked anyway and it’s just too nice to work as a horror film either, so it feels stuck in between, not helped by the fact it’s also a bit of slog that goes exactly where you’d think it would, and just repeats itself over and over.

I don’t think this is a bad film, it means well, it tries but sadly it just doesn’t work either way you slice it.

[EXPRESSO] Lupin The IIIrd The Movie: The Immortal Bloodline (2025) | Mystery Of Monkey

So, i did decide to just go see this new Lupin The 3^rd film for funsies, i mean, i sure do love me some Lupin (and it’s a freakin institution here in Italy, so it’s already screening here), and is directed by Takeshi Koike, of Redline fame, i am in.

Problem is, i haven’t really kept up with Lupin many anime iterations, i’m more of a casual enjoyer, and this is meant as the conclusion of Koike’s “Lupin the IIIrd” subseries, maybe a send off for the character of Lupin itself, as it also takes story elements from the very first Lupin The 3^rd movie, The Mistery Of Mamo.

Not that you needed this digest as the movie does a handy recap, which also makes it obvious this isn’t a random Lupin movie at all, but for what concerns this film, is about Lupin & the gang being lured into an uncharted island by someone that knows them very well, and forced to face not only the island venomous mists, but an apparently immortal being known as “Muom”….

I don’t know if this will actually be the last Lupin III film ever, doubt it, but it’s the first one in 30 frigging years made in traditional animation, and it sure as hell looks great, even with the occasional 3D CG bits for the monsters, it’s very stilish, the action is great, but it’s also lacking on plot and character development, despite the very strong start the pacing also suffers as soon as the story does, so it ends up being “almost good” but nothing feels properly developed, more focused on being stylish old school pulp action (more serious in tone than “classic Lupin”), which it is still fun, but the film does ultimately suffer from it.

Decent, but kinda disappointing.

[EXPRESSO] Five Nights At Freddy’s 2 (2025) | Hind N Seek

Predictably so, we’re back for more FNAF movie escapades, and i’m back to still not knowing (or caring) much about the series, but curious enough to check these films out.

The events of the first film that went down that night at Freddy Fazbear’s Pizzeria became a local legend, leading to a “Fazfest” being held in town.

The protagonist’ little sister, Abby, misses her animatronic friends (more correctly, the children’ souls bound inside them), but things go south as she’s approached by a new menace, the Marionette, and we explore the original Freddy Fazbear establishment, and learn of its sordid secrets.

I didn’t expect much, the first one i thought it was okay, middling but about what you would expect… but in retrospect, that might have been a fluke of sorts.

This sequel is just drivel, lazy slop, just a random mish mash of stuff cobbled together, with no structure, no cinematic structure, more interested in mimicking verbatim stuff that i suppose happens in the games, as this time series’ creator, Scott Cawthon, is the only one credited for the screenplay, and clearly doesn’t care that this is a film and not a videogame, more interested with dated, inane preoccupations of “not being enough like the games” and confusing “lore” for “plot”.

It’s just so lazy, cliched and downright stupid it’s actually insulting, even for a children’s horror film, one clearly aware that it can squeeze any clump of shit and it won’t matter to the box office (or its establishe fanbase)…. so does exactly that.

Even worse than the actors trying but unable to save the movie from itself, it’s how it ultimately amounts to little more than a big set-up and lore dumpage for the third one, more than its own thing.

Can’t wait to be swindled again!

[EXPRESSO] Troll 2 (2025) | Altercation Of The Gargantuas

No, not THAT Troll 2, this is the recently released sequel to the Norwegian 2022 film “Troll” esclusive for Netflix.

Memories of Fragasso’s tale of non-trolls and faux-Orson Welles ghost grandpas aside, the plot of this Troll 2 sees the government call back the main protagonists of the first movie, Nora, the troll expert, Andreas, working for the prime minister, and soldier Kristopher, as another giant troll is awaken, and trying to find a solution will have them end up investigating the history of Norway’s christianization, finding a peaceful troll to befriend and help them in stopping the other one.

The first one was decent, this is honestly just a mediocre affair that hasn’t enough of either drama or comedy to sustain itself, so it feels kinda meandering to and fro’ action scenes of the trolls fighting each other, and even by giant monster movie standards, these are way too brief to be satisfying, despite the solid effects for the creatures.

There are subplots and characterizations stubs that ultimately amount to very little as the movie doesn’t develop really anything proper, even with the plot taking an adventure, Indiana Jones-esque bend, it’s all just kinda thrown in there, with too much of the movie spent of re-establishing characters and clumsily giving everyone some emotional baggage; honestly it feels incredibly rushed in every regard, and it’s hard to feel any conflict as not even the actors feel that invested in the stock roles they’re given.

It doesn’t feel like a sequel that took 3 years-ish to make, even just a couple of decades ago this would have been cranked out the very next year (tops) after the original dropped.

While teasing a sequel that might be better, this Troll 2 is simply too generic, cliched and unfocused to rise above mediocrity.

The very early December grabbag update post: Dinos, Animatronics Boogaloo, Letting It Die, PS5, and winter breaks

Time for an update post as Dicember looms very close… and is here already.

As previously announced, the first week of December i will be taking a break from full lenght reviews, which will resume on December 8th, on a weekly basis leading up to Christmas, and of course 12 Days Of Dino December.

Which will go on as always, no big changes.

I will have reviews of the new FNAF film out, and i guess the third James Cameron’s Avatar film, because that is a thing, and one i do not care for, i’d rather have Cameron work on that Alita Battle Angel sequel, if he’s willing to gamble zillions into a series, better than his First Nation alien Smurfs saga that apparently no one cares for but will see to go anyway, though the more it goes on the faster it might cull itself out (if you break records, then it becomes increasingly hard to keep doing that on a regular basis), so nevermind.

Continua a leggere

[EXPRESSO] Hyrule Warriors: Age Of Imprisonment NSWITCH2 | Mysterious Construct X

I had some reservations about this one, despite my love for the Hyrule Warriors subseries, since it wasn’t handled by Omega Force (i guess busy with the PW4 DLC, the Dynasty Warriors Origins expansion and the DW3 remaster), but developed by a new studio under TK, AAA Games Studio.

But my doubts were (mostly) put to rest once i got to play it.

This is indeed the prequel to Tears Of The Kingdom it was announced as, as in, unlike the previous Hyrule Warriors game, Age Of Calamity, this is an actually canonical entry narrating the War For The Imprisonment mentioned in TOTK and taking place at the very beginning of this timeline’s Hyrule, with his first king, Rauru, uniting the race-tribes of the land to fight back against Ganondorf, whose evil and lust for power led to him becoming the Demon King.

A time travelling Zelda also aids Rauru, alongside a mysterious yet very familiar feeling humanoid construct, accompanied in his quest against evil by a wandering Korogu…

Gameplay wise, it builds off the systems and overall structure from Age Of Calamity, adding new elements taken from Tears Of The Kingdom like the Zonai devices, making for a really solid and fun Warriors game, with satisfying characters that aren’t cloned from the previous HW iterations, even though the roster does feel famished to include secondary characters due to story limitations, and the map design doesn’t really dare to stray from the basics.

It’s a pity because it’s good, and close to being as great as Age Of Calamity, but eventually it shows some flaws or inconsistencies that stem from inexperience, though it also has a surprisingly decent-to-good narrative that isn’t stretched out, it’s a sizeable game and performance wise its runs so much better than Age Of Calamity did.

[EXPRESSO] Zootopia 2 (2025) | We Will Survive

I’ve been skipping most of Disney output of lately, Wish did reinforce this habit, but since i did like the first Zootopia and thought it was one of the best modern Disney films, i was planning on watching the sequel. So i did.

After a brief recap of the final twist and ending of the first movie (which is roughly “one child old” by now), Zootopia 2 follows up Nick and Judy’s unit, which is jeopardized due to them fumbling an operation and causing destruction in the wake of the city centennial, for which a book pivotal for the very foundation of Zootopia itself will be shown to the public.

But despite this, Judy finds proof of a reptile entire the city, which hasn’t happened in a centhury, and she investigates, her and Nick find themselves involved in another conspiracy, get framed and have to escape and get to the bottom of this mistery.

While it’s yet another conspiracy plot, we do get some solid worldbuilding, new characters and a solid villain, and we get to see more of this animal world and how it works beyond the big metropolis, as the sequel builds on the themes of racism, prejudice and discrimination with gentrification and (more) classism now, here done with the “reptile problem” and a political scheme about expanding biomes made for specific types of animals at the expense of others.

It does some of the typical Disney quirks plotwise, but it’s more the benign ones, these are not as bad as they could be, the new characters are fun, there is some sensibile development of the unusual cop buddy duo of Judy and Nick, there are some fun, quick references/nods for the older crowds, and overall it’s honestly a great sequel and a pretty good animated children film,

[EXPRESSO] The Smashing Machine (2025) | Pet Rock

There is some hilarity in an A24 distributed sports drama starring Dwayne Johnson, not because he has hair this time (which is kinda absurd to see anyway), but since it’s an obvious attempt by the beloved wrestler-turned-actor to go for that Oscar cheddar, with a biopic directed by Benny Safdie (Good Time, Uncut Gems), costarring alongside Emily Blunt and playing a figure that Johnson would effortlessy seen as a reflection of his past career, in this case UFC fighter Mark Kerr.

That said, it does mean we get to see Johnson try more and go beyond the same persona he has kept for his film carreer, despite this being a very calcuted risk, but one i’d say pays off, as this biopic depicts Kerr’s rise to the higher ranks in the early days of MMA fighting, him struggling with his drug addiction, his obsession for victory and his troubled relationship with his girlfriend, as his first loss during the Japanese league send his world crashing down.

Structurally there’s nothing you haven’t seen before in a sports drama film, especially about combat sports, but it does retell Kerr story in a satisfying way, it doesn’t hold back but also makes a solid argument on how victory isn’t everything, or more specifically, that losing isn’t everything either, it just something bound to happen eventually, if it happens it’s fine.

I have to point out that apparently a lot of the film is more or less lifted (as in, even camera angles) from a documentary of the same name made back in 2002 apparently since i saw it mentioned but can’t say i’ve even heard of (or seen) that one before, and that seems to be case for most people, but even so i’d say The Smashing Machine is a good sports drama.

[EXPRESSO] Shelby Oaks (2025) | Paranormal Tapes

In the early 2000s, the early days of internet, a group of teens making content for a paranormal Youtube channel all go missing after investigating the abandoned small town of Shelby Oaks.

Fear that it might a ploy to boost viewership turns to tragedy as most of the crew is finally found, dead and brutally mutilated, aside from one of the channel’s creators, Mia, still missing.

For the following 12 years, her sister Riley has kept searching for Mia, and is now collaborating in a documentary about the case, with Riley’s husband hoping this will – at least – give them closure so they can start a family as they planned before the incident.

Things soon go even more south as a man shows up to Riley’s house and immediatly shoots himself in the head, while holding onto a bloodied cassette tape with the label reading “Shelby Oaks”…

Interestingly, this is not a found footage movie either, it starts off as one, has sequences shot in that fashion, but it has a traditionally styled narrative at the heart of it, one that veers into the supernatural possession subgenre, with a bit of folk horror too.

Yet this is not the jumpscare laden fest some might think, at all, being proper spooky and atmospheric but also NOT one of those to conflate that into an excuse to show bugger all.

It’s quite competently put together too, with some decent acting, solid production values, and it clearly made with respect for the genre as a whole, even though it’s hold back by its various inspirations and reverent references that do come off as pastiche (and a kinda shaky third act).

It has that roughness of debut films (because it is), but still, it’s a decent first feature lenght by critic-turned-director Chris Stuckmann.