Bladestorm Nightmare PS4 [REVIEW] | The Hundred Years Grind

Ah, yes, Bladestorm, the ginger step-child born of enabling Omega Force to once again make something that isn’t a Warriors game (it’s worth remembering they once did also do fighting games and RPGs, among others), yet isn’t one of Koei historical turn based grand strategy titles like Nobunaga’s Ambition or Uncharted Waters, but more like a real-time Kessen.

This time around we’re taking a break from the Three Kingdoms, Sengoku era Japan or Asian history in general, as we’re going back to the middle ages, yes, but Europe this once, in the 14^th and 15^th centhury, to revisit the events of the Hundred Years War between France and England.

And of course this comes with a big, gynormic “loosely based on” sticker, because it’s a videogame, it’s a videogame based on historic events by the Dynasty Warriors developer, so you already know historical accuracy isn’t gonna be on the table as the main course, or barely at all, because who gotta have historical figures like Gilles Rais and John Talbot interact, and also give them very flamboyant anime style design… why the fuck not?

The plot is told mostly in cutscenes (that develop the various character arcs and of course take a lot of liberties in terms of characterization for the historical figures represented, designs aside), as your player customized character is just another dude in a mercenary band that happens to be involved in the conflict at hand and participate in both “trivial” and important battles of the war, with the option to side with either faction and also save Joanne D’Arc, if you want.

This was true for the original PS3/360/PC release of the game back in 2007, but we’re tackling the expanded port for PS4/X-Box One/Steam, Bladestorm: Nightmare, the PS4 version specifically (as apparently the PC port of this that’s on Steam is shit on a stick, and being an older Koei PC port, yeap, i believe it), which adds some features but mostly a new fantasy campaign that gives this release its new subtitle, Nightmare, which we will tackle later.

Continua a leggere

[EXPRESSO] Andy Warhol: American Dream (2023) | Byzantine Soup

Released just now here as 2 days limited event screening, i decided to give Andy Warhol: American Dream, this fairly recent documentary about the famous artist Andy Warhol (as it makes sense to when you put his name in the title), even though i don’t really like his works or style, personally.

I don’t hate him, his works or the impact he had on popular culture and art alike, btw, i just am not really a fan, but i will say this is a better film than expected, as instead of just going through the stuff most people already know… it does eventually get to that, but alongside various critic figures, museum curators and experts chiming in, it mostly dwelves into the aspect Warhol himself avoided discussing: his roots.

Which in this case is being the son of Rusyns immigrants from Slovakia, ailing from a small rural village observing the religious traditions of the Svolak Greek Catholic Church, travelling to the United States as many others did to seek that fabled “American Dream” of a better life, with Andy being the youngest of 4 siblings, and this documentary puts big emphasis on his family and friends, as they are the main narrators-actors telling about Andy, his early life, the familial ties to his homeland, how they perceived them there in Slovakia, giving also more intimate stories revolving around the well know events of his life and carrer, from his Campbell soup paintings, his celebrity portraits, the Factory, his films, him getting shot, etc.

I think it could have been edited better (as at times the movie repeats itself) and since it’s not dubbed (some people talk in english, most in Slovakian)…. the color choice for the subs is kinda infortunate at times, but still, a nice surprise worth seeing.

Dynasty Warriors Gundam PS3 [REVIEW] | #musoumay

I don’t think Mobile Suit Gundam needs an introduction, given its one of the more popular and old mecha franchises that are still around, arguably THE mecha franchise if there ever was one.

You know it, you love it… i mostly kinda experienced it via osmosis, as i never fully bothered to be invested in any of its many iterations, be it the classic 0079 original, the Z Gundam one, the super deformed Three Kingdoms ones, the ones about milfs and kids building Gunplas.

Or the space tomato lesbian one. Or whatever the new Gundam series that will come out in the meantime of me posting and you reading this will be about.

I didn’t even plan to ignore Gundam, i just never really went deep into any of its iterations, as it happened, and – as i think i’ve said before – i’m actually way more familiar with frigging Sgt. Frog (yes, Keroro) than actual Gundam, so it both kinda counts and not really counts at the same time, meaning i’ve been told the series is about the horrors of war more than the cool robots… but the robot do LOOK cool, there’s no anti-memery (or counter arguments, and so on) to argue that at simple skin deep fact, them mobile suits design are legendary stuff.

So in a way i’m really not “qualified”… or i was, because this did serve as a gateway entry for me, sure i love them Dynasty Warriors, make them cool looking robots instead of superhero fantasy warlords, just as good, or even better, i will finally learn what the fuck the original Gundam and some other of its series are about with Dynasty Warriors Gundam, why not?

Continua a leggere

Asterix & Obelix XXXL: The Ram From Hibernia PS4 [REVIEW] | ….Did Nothing Wrong?

Due to some unforeseen schedule issues, we’ll close out the entire XXL series with the latest one, Asterix & Obelix XXXL: The Ram From Hibernia, released in late 2022 by Microids and once again developed by Osome Studio.

This feel immediatly like a continuation of XXL 3, despite the original plot being about a welcome surprise: as in, there is another lone village that has managed to fend off the Roman invasion, outside of Asterix & Obelix’s. It’s not in Gaul, but Hibernia (aka ye olde Ireland), and the trick lies in the titular ram (being also the beloved pet of the Hibernian chieftain) that is able to inspire/enforce armies to fight even when fatigued with its magical horns.

The Romans though managed to capture the ram, which depressed the Hibernian chief and made him unwilling to fend off the invasion, so his daughter comes to ask for the help of the Gaul village, Asterix and Obelix obviously willing and able to go help them flip off Romans abroad…

It’s a cute premise and like the previous games they do get the tone and humour of the series right, its charm and all, but – like this game as a whole – it’s mostly underbaked and short lived, there’s no time to properly develop any of the new characters, as the entire narrative whizzes by too fast.

Continua a leggere

[EXPRESSO] Queer (2024) | Bum Fancy

FIY, i did skip Challengers because i was kinda not feeling to see another romance movie by Guadagnino, especially one that’s also a sports drama about tennis (i wasn’t too fond of Bones And All either), but i heard of the troubled distribution Queer had, leading to just release in theathers here a few days ago, and i was curious.

Based on William Burroughs’ novel of the same name, Queer is set in 1950s Mexico City , where the protagonist, Williams Lee, a nearly middle aged gay man, lives his expat with occasionally mingling with the few people in the American community living there, having tryst with other men, until one day he meets this young new student, Eugene, whom just arrived in town, giving him hope he can finally have a real, intimate connection with someone, not just on a physical level…

as you might have assumed, it’s a virtually plotless affair, as it more a sequence of accidents and events started by Lee that “drags” Eugene into sex, drinking like a sponge, with the third act basically having the movie go jungle adventure in search of ayahuasca (because of its rumored “telepathy powers”, not to talk to Yakub), have a romantic body horror sequence then straight up propose its own junkie version of “those” notorious 2001: A Space Odissey scenes.

While i wish it ended a bit earlier than it did, to be honest i was captivated, there are indeed some performances of a lifetime here, it’s as excessive as all Guadagnino’ movies are (see also the deliberately anachronistic musical choice and swinging sense of “realism”), you expect them to be, you want them to be, and this one admittely did grab me a lot more, not great, but indeed good.

Worth a watch, at the very least.

Asterix & Obelix XXL 3: The Crystal Menhir PS4 [REVIEW] | XXS-ix

One might wonder why i’m not reviewing this one as a Platformation Time Again subject.

That is because, confusingly, the third entry in this series of platforming-action games… isn’t a platformer at all.

Yeah, took me by surprise because why wouldn’t it be, especially now with the retro 3D platformer revival going on to this day?

Regardless, this is the third entry in the series, meaning its a brand new game developed by Osome Studio, makes sense as they handled the remasters/ports of the first two games that launched on PS2 20+ years ago, as Microids is definitely seeing a lot more return in using the Asterix & Obelix license than others, like their Marsupilami game (remember that? I kinda do and kinda not), not really a surprise, since the Uderzo & Goscinny created comic book series has been popular for decades in Europe, France obviously, but others including Italy as well.

But we’ve discussed this before, so let’s get to the plot.

The plot is also untied to the previous XXL games…. or is it?

Continua a leggere

[EXPRESSO] Sinners (2025) | From Blues Till Dawn

There are movies that are best enjoyed by going in “cold”, by i don’t know if Sinners is one of those, as i can imagine people being confused if they were not aware of From Dusk Until Dawn having been a thing for a couple of decades (alongside some sequels i keep forgetting exist).

Because it is that, but done less as a deliberately disjointed surprise jump in tone, direction and subject matter, as it made to feed into the themes of freedom, black heritage and racial tensions, with the first half being a thriller drama set in 30s America, where a couple of brothers in the crime business, Smoke and Stack, go back to their town in Mississippi, in order to try and make some cash by setting up a juke joint, and they involve their cousin, a budding bluesman dubbed “Preacher Boy”.

The second half is them being stalked and having to survive when vampires surround the juke joint at night, and yes, its indeed doing a “From Dusk Until Dawn”, turning things straight into horror territory, with pretty good effects too and some very nice musical bits, lots of carnage, really good acting as always, especially Michael B. Jordan as both “Smokestack” brothers.

I respect it’s ambition and willing to do some out there shit (like the “future and past” visions of blues music), but the editing at times is frustrating, it kinda keeps going even after what would have been a good time to end the movie… twice, which is partially due to close up some subplots.

At times it’s a bit too much and it’s a miracle it works so well instead of being the utter mess it sounds-could have been like, but it is still well done, bold and stylish, i do recommend it.

Platformation Time Again #3: Asterix & Obelix XXL 2 PS4 | DS, PSP

HISTORY

Since i’ve given a basic description/primer for Asterix & Obelix as a whole for the Platformation review of the fist XXL game, i won’t be repeating that, so i will simply refer you back to that if you are not too familiar (or at all) with the series.

What i will do is talk about the context of the platforming genre as the time XXL 2 originally released, because in just 3 years after the first Asterix & Obelix XXL came out, a lot happened.

As i said, even the first game felt kinda old fashioned compared to other platformers on offer at the time, heck, not even going back to the original Conker’s Bad Fur Day, in 2003 alone Jak II kickstarted the whole “teenage edgelord “phase of the genre, influenced to be “more mature” thanks to the rise in popularity of games like the 3D Grand Theft Auto games, and this was made even more clear when Sonic Team clearly saw Naughty Dog’s sequel “dark” turnabout and made the Shadow The Hedgehog game.

Continua a leggere

Platformation Time Again #2 EXTEND: Asterix & Obelix: XXL (GBA)

Main Review

Asterix & Obelix: XXL

GAME BOY ADVANCE

As i said in the main article, dedicated portable versions of home console games were quite the norm back in the PS2 era, it was WAY before the Switch and hybrid consoles of its ilk were common places. Especially for (but not limited to) platform games, it was rarer NOT to see a Game Boy Color or Game Boy Advance version of a big budget multi platform IP on consoles and PC.

Heck, even that forgotten, pre-Lords Of The Rings film trilogy Hobbit game had one.

Had to cover all possible bases, squeeze out all the possible moolah, which Activision did to the extend of almost being an art form in itself, but indeed it was common to see a version sharing the same name and cover art of a console or PC platformer game but on a GBA cartridge.

Due to the system’ limitations, this usually meant basically doing either a redux version of the home console gameplay or an entirely new game also based on that specific license and idea, but in 2D, it was reasonable and expected, to a certain degree, to have the “dimensional downgrade”.

Sometimes they tried to “compromise” and opted for the ol’ “faux 3D on budget” choice of being isometric, like the first two GBA Spyro titles and the Banjo Kazooie: Grunty’s Revenge, to name the first ones that come to mind.

Continua a leggere

Platformation Time Again #2: Asterix & Obelix XXL Romastered PS4

I originally reviewed this game to celebrate the release of the latest Asterix & Obelix live action film at the time, that being Asterix & Obelix: The Middle Kingdom, but it was before i fully decided to reboot this rubric, and since i was gonna cover Asterix & Obelix XXL 2, i’d figured i would “remaster/remake” the old review, thought it’s so expanded and has more than enough and more in-depth writing it’s almost new one, BUT since the old review it’s quite recent, i didn’t feel the need to completely throw out everything, i’m pointing this out if this feels like deja-vu.

It is. Kinda.

Also, FIY, i will try to use both original and localized names for the characters, for clarity.

HISTORY

This is one of those series that is huge in many regions but since it never properly took off in North America, it may look like it’s a thing that’s “huge in Europe but nowhere else” (especially given how the perception skewed the US as the only place where things happen or matter), but Asterix & Obelix is one of the longest running comic book series and one of the most popular of all time, to the point its being only outsold and out-translated by One Piece, worlwide.

I grew up with these, as it was hugely popular in Italy as well (irony noted) as France, Belgium, the UK, and basically anywhere that wasn’t America, even though most of the later animated films did see some kind of US release (of the live actions one i think only Asterix And The Middle Kingdom, the most recent one, saw a Netflix release in US territories), and there’s a Netflix exclusive animated series adaptation of Asterix The Big Fight coming later this year, in the hope of feeding a US fanbase of the series that i’m sure is there and its fuckin starved in terms of official releases.

Just in case, let’s go over the basic premise.

Continua a leggere