12 Days Of Dino Dicember # 56: Gertie The Dinosaur (1914)

I hinted at this while reviewing Secret Of The Loch for last year’s “oldie” Dino Dicember entry, so we might as well go back even further in time.

Okay, maybe somewhere AFTER the zoatrope was the new fangled talk of the town.

I honestly can’t think of anything more ancient (in many ways) for dinosaur audio-visual media than Gertie The Dinosaur by Winsor Mc Cay, one of the earlier cartoonists and animators.

Contrary to popular belief, this is not the first animated film ever made, as McCay himself made an animated version of Little Nemo In Slumberland back in 1911, and in 1912 he also made another film, How A Mosquito Operates.

And if we want we CAN go back further into the proto-history of animation itself, with Reynaud’s Pauvre Pierrot from 1892, or Blackton’s Humourous Phases Of Funny Faces from 1906, this being the more accurate if we consider “proper” animation as in early hand drawn animation, and we discount stuff like Katsudo Shashin from 1907, which didn’t use photographies but had the drawings impressed via stencil on the film itself, via an instrument also used for magic lantern slides, so one could argue that had more in common with the ye old kamishibai shows (basically a magic lantern live action street theather done for kids).

But this is the first animated film to feature a dinosaur, ever, and we’ve come to pay our respect to “Granny Gertie” herself.

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[EXPRESSO] Nuremberg (2025) | Nazi Turnabout

A historical court drama about the behind the scenes of the Nuremberg trails, where the surving architects of the Nazi regime are put on trial for crimes against humanity for the Holocaust.

An army psychiatrist, Douglas Kelley (Rami Malek), is tasked with looking after the mental well being of Hermann Goering (Russell Crowe), Hitler’s second in command, alongside the other surviving Nazi hierarchs, while the Allies investigates and discuss why this trial should be even done in the first place.

Kelley, also hoping to write a book about the vents (and in turn maybe understand the psychological proceeding that led the Nazis to previously unseen amount of efficient evil), forms a bond with Goering…

While one might argue this comes at the right time, when we’re seeing history on the verge of repeating again (for the worse), one might say it’s a bit too little and that maybe, given the current geopolitical state, we should have skipped the trial, but this just isn’t that kind of film.

This is an old fashion history drama that’s fairly unpretentious and uninterested in being artsy or provocative, as it mostly wants to educate people while entertaining them, and basically exists as a vehicle for actors to try and get an Oscar out of it.

Not necessarily “bad bait” when it gives us a really outstanding performance by Crowe as the charimastic yet subtly manipulative Goering, as he and Kelley have this “Hannibal-Lecter-Graham” style relationship going on, though Malek’s performance (while not necessarily bad) just isn’t as good as Crowe’s, and oddly the sequences at the stand are kinda brief, despite the build up to them.

That said, it also goes by swimmingly, despite it’s 2 hours and 40 minutes runtime, so it’s good, even if old fashioned, but not necessarily lesser for it.

Final Verdict: Expresso

12 Days Of Dino Dicember # 53: Primitive War (2025)

I wasn’t aware of Primitive War until a friend recommended looking up the trailer some time ago, and indeed it looked promising and actually kinda cool, like an actual effort and not just the usual low budget dinosaur drivel that we get nowadays.

I mean, if going for the Vietnam route worked for King Kong, it can work for a dinosaur film as well, why not? It’s at least something to shake up the formula.

And it also released earlier this year, so i didn’t have to dust this off from the crypt or something.

in 1968, during the Vietnam war, a Green Beret platoon goes missing during an operation, so a search & rescue team, named Vulture Squad, is tasked with a recon mission to locate the missing platoon, only for them to be attacked by dinosaurs.

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Platformation Time Again: The “WAH” Heard All Around The World & Ubisoft Oldies

the Nintendo back catalogue offerings have been very little and mostly minor, so i was surprised to see all of sudden some old Ubisoft titles surface as part of the N64 Classics app, Rayman 2 not so much, but i did not expect at all to see a rerelease of Tonic Trouble, a mostly forgotten Ubisoft platformer-puzzler of that era that can be seen as a sister game to Rayman 2, which in return has been re-released to hell and back, and one whose N64 version isn’t exactly the most praised or definitive, but it’s good to have that too, since the two games kinda go together, in a way, and will be available on the service (which does require having the Expansion Pak tier of NSO subscription) on Dicember 17th, so very soon indeed.

Also, this happening a mere month after i bought an used copy of Tonic Trouble on the N64 is definitely a timing of all time, but what can you do?

I could take this as a sign of sorts, but the full lenght review for that on the rubric will have to wait at least until May.

Even more surprising, is the Gamecube Classics for Switch 2 adding off Wario World, the only 3D platformer outing for the “evil Mario” himself still, one i had mixed feelings about but personally felt it needed a follow up of sorts, a second chance since it’s not exactly a great game, even when it came out the Gamecube had way better platformers to offer, but i do have a fondness for it.

I did actually review that at detail before, but i’m gonna play it from scratch on the Switch 2 Gamecube app to see if i changed my mind about it or not, so expect that kinda extended rewrite somewhere early 2026.

The Crawling Eye AKA The Trollenberg Terror (1958) [REVIEW] | Nightmare In Alps Land

Since in recent years i found it was “HD remastered” on DVD by the Italian distributor Sinister Film (hence it was cheap and something i didn’t need to pay extra to import), i’ve been curious to check this out. Even if this italian re-release is under the “I Mostri Delle Rocce Atomiche”(lit “The Atomic Rock Monsters”) title, somehow an even worse title than the more common one its known in the US and worlwide, The Crawling Eye, which fuckins spoils how the monsters look.

But oh well, who cares, since the movie had quite the legacy, which included being the inspiration for the latter John Carpenter’s The Fog and being spoofed during the early days of MST3K.

Kinda funny how despite the DVD title the movie itself still shows the original title, The Trollenberg Terror…. i kinda understand why it was changed for international releases, honestly.

It’s not incorrect, thought, as the plot starts off with mountaineers being mysteriously decapitated on the slopes of the Swiss mountain known as the Trollenberg, scientists with a mountain observatory for catching cosmic rays finding there’s an odd cloud that simply sits upon the mountainside, never moving, while emanating a clear radioactive trace.

Continua a leggere “The Crawling Eye AKA The Trollenberg Terror (1958) [REVIEW] | Nightmare In Alps Land”

[EXPRESSO] Troll 2 (2025) | Altercation Of The Gargantuas

No, not THAT Troll 2, this is the recently released sequel to the Norwegian 2022 film “Troll” esclusive for Netflix.

Memories of Fragasso’s tale of non-trolls and faux-Orson Welles ghost grandpas aside, the plot of this Troll 2 sees the government call back the main protagonists of the first movie, Nora, the troll expert, Andreas, working for the prime minister, and soldier Kristopher, as another giant troll is awaken, and trying to find a solution will have them end up investigating the history of Norway’s christianization, finding a peaceful troll to befriend and help them in stopping the other one.

The first one was decent, this is honestly just a mediocre affair that hasn’t enough of either drama or comedy to sustain itself, so it feels kinda meandering to and fro’ action scenes of the trolls fighting each other, and even by giant monster movie standards, these are way too brief to be satisfying, despite the solid effects for the creatures.

There are subplots and characterizations stubs that ultimately amount to very little as the movie doesn’t develop really anything proper, even with the plot taking an adventure, Indiana Jones-esque bend, it’s all just kinda thrown in there, with too much of the movie spent of re-establishing characters and clumsily giving everyone some emotional baggage; honestly it feels incredibly rushed in every regard, and it’s hard to feel any conflict as not even the actors feel that invested in the stock roles they’re given.

It doesn’t feel like a sequel that took 3 years-ish to make, even just a couple of decades ago this would have been cranked out the very next year (tops) after the original dropped.

While teasing a sequel that might be better, this Troll 2 is simply too generic, cliched and unfocused to rise above mediocrity.

[EXPRESSO] The Smashing Machine (2025) | Pet Rock

There is some hilarity in an A24 distributed sports drama starring Dwayne Johnson, not because he has hair this time (which is kinda absurd to see anyway), but since it’s an obvious attempt by the beloved wrestler-turned-actor to go for that Oscar cheddar, with a biopic directed by Benny Safdie (Good Time, Uncut Gems), costarring alongside Emily Blunt and playing a figure that Johnson would effortlessy seen as a reflection of his past career, in this case UFC fighter Mark Kerr.

That said, it does mean we get to see Johnson try more and go beyond the same persona he has kept for his film carreer, despite this being a very calcuted risk, but one i’d say pays off, as this biopic depicts Kerr’s rise to the higher ranks in the early days of MMA fighting, him struggling with his drug addiction, his obsession for victory and his troubled relationship with his girlfriend, as his first loss during the Japanese league send his world crashing down.

Structurally there’s nothing you haven’t seen before in a sports drama film, especially about combat sports, but it does retell Kerr story in a satisfying way, it doesn’t hold back but also makes a solid argument on how victory isn’t everything, or more specifically, that losing isn’t everything either, it just something bound to happen eventually, if it happens it’s fine.

I have to point out that apparently a lot of the film is more or less lifted (as in, even camera angles) from a documentary of the same name made back in 2002 apparently since i saw it mentioned but can’t say i’ve even heard of (or seen) that one before, and that seems to be case for most people, but even so i’d say The Smashing Machine is a good sports drama.

Ghost Pilots (Arcade Classics Archives Neo Geo) NSWITCHDDL [REVIEW] | My Very Own 194X

I love the Neo Geo, as in, i was a wee child that did always light up when the arcade cabinets started up with that logo and name, letting me know i was in for a good time.

I never owned a Neo Geo cabinet or one of their home consoles, so aside from the odd port on PS1 or PS2 collections, for me Neo Geo was something you went to the arcades, which already tells you how ancient (in prospective) i am, given how that market/scene ended up in the following decades.

That said, i’m glad i never encounted a Ghost Pilots machine, and to be honest i never even heard of this one until i found it and bought its Arcade Classics Archives release on the Nintendo eshop.

As to why, it’s because its one of those early releases for the Neo Geo based hardware that are better forgotten, left in their own little burrow in the ground, their own little cubicle in videogame history.

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The Spooktacular Eight #31: Dante’s Inferno: An Animated Epic (2010)

As an Italian, it always tickled me silly how back in the late 2000s EA’s idea for competiting with Sony’s God Of War franchise was to pillage The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri and basically transform it into a power fantasy action game about saving a damsel in distress, which happens to be done by traversing Hell as described by the Tuscanian poet.

I guess because it was a well known public domain literary work that would also work as a quick and dirty band-aid to feign some refinement, and to be honest everyone was jumping on the hack n slash action game bandwagon at the time, so of course EA would have tried their hands at it.

Still feels fuckin random because they could just have made a Roman Empire themed hack n slash, but i guess they couldn’t push a marketing campaign literally encouraging to “go to hell” and the “sin to win” marketing shizzle.

I’m not even offended because this is so fuckin american it’s hilarious, i mean, sure, it’s based on Alighieri’s first book of The Divine Comedy as in it has the concept of venturing through Hell, it has a guy named Dante, a gal named Beatrice, and The Devil(TM) sure, it’s the same thing.

Continua a leggere “The Spooktacular Eight #31: Dante’s Inferno: An Animated Epic (2010)”

[EXPRESSO] Eddington (2025) | Divide Schmivide

Ari Aster doing a COVID-19 crime western comedy thing?

Sign me in!

Set during the 2020 pandemic, we see the local sheriff (played by Joaquin Phoenix) of the small town of of Eddington, New Mexico, get spiffy against the local mayor (played by Pedro Pascal) for the mask mandate, and it escalates to the sheriff deciding to run for mayor himself, sabotage his rival on social media, while the climate gets worse due to events such as the George Floyd’s murder, etc.

I will respect that Aster doesn’t give a shit about making movies that unearth a recent, hugely divisive period of reality people would rather move on from, and yes, this is a cornucopia of deliberately unlikeable characters, from Q-anon pilled conspiracy theorists in-laws, hypocritical liberal youths into activism as long as there’s some pussy to gain from it, cult leaders, grifters, etc.

Problem is, it’s an unfocused mess which satirizes everything but does so in such a shallow and frankly unsatisfying manner, regurgitating stuff we already know and are still living through, with barely a plot to hold onto, something to actually build to, or characters that actually have any depth, feeling even more cartoonishly stupid than they’re meant to, and somehow able to make actors like Pascal and Phoenix come off as bad, which is sadly impressive.

It’s more frustrating than anything else, as the actual jokes that work are too few and far between for an almost 3 hours long movie, and while it picks up a little midway through, it borders on being an completely boring, unfunny movie.

It all feels like an uncomfortable but also flavourless remasticated portrait of 2020 and today’s America; plus, while i did suggest it might take some time to revaluate Beau Is Afraid…. i’m not so sure about Eddington.