Hunter X Hunter: Phantom Rogue (2013) [REVIEW] | Master of Muppets

Anime movies based around popular shonen series aren’t weird per sé, but just the fact they made Hunter X Hunter anime films feels somehow off to me.

Yes i know Hunter X Hunter has been a big Shonen Jump series…. but it’s not quite your typical shonen manga series, not quite ready-made for the “non-canon original story anime film” pipeline.

Just reading the synopsis i got the feeling this was just a way to extend HXH presence as an anime after the 2011 series ended (and was never continued)…but nope, this was released in Japanese theathers in 2013, in the final stretched of Greed Island arc.

Yet, even so, my gut was somehow correct, this is indeed what it sounded like, something ordered upon from a committee more than anything else, to fatten the suits wallets with cinema money, with a “double hit”, since later the same year Madhouse also released in theathers HXH: Last Mission.

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Mary Shelley’s Frankenhole SEASON ONE AND TWO [REVIEW] | A Graveyard Smash

I’ve hold off of reviewing this one in the hope Adult Swim would release it on physical media, but i’m tired, even though you can buy the series on various streaming sites… which still means technically there’s no real international release, even if you can see the whole series on AS website.

well, not quite the whole series, but we’ll get to that later.

This has been a favourite of mine for years, it’s Halloween, fuck it, we’re going through Mary Shelley’s Frankenhole, from Dino Stamatoppolous, better known for his other Adult Swim cult series, Moral Orel.

It ran from June 2010 to march 2012, amassing 20 episodes, divided over for 2 seasons, but nowadays i feel it mostly faded away, and it’s never brought up in discussion, so i’m doing it now.

Also yes, we already had a Frankenstein review as an extra treat, so consider this an Hallowen treat.

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Frankenstein 1970 (1958) [REVIEW] | Nuclear; Stein

I remember i had a class on genre horror films and TV, and i remember my teacher (while touching upon the latter days of italian horror in the ’60s and ’70s) discussed how – and i gonna paraphrase here – when genre movies start to implement meta elements, it’s usually a sign of how worn out it has become, of a status of current decay, in the sense that often horror films tended to retreat on self-referentiality and opting for the “film within a film” framing more out of desperation, in a search of some semblance of freshness to offer viewers, while de facto contributing to the genre’s eventually collapsing on itself, before it can find new stories or ways to tell them.

Obviously the meta approach in itself isn’t “bad”, but one of the examples brought up was The Crimson Executioner, a 1965 film better known as Bloody Pit Of Horror, which was a sort of desperate attempt at keeping gothic horror relevant in the mid-to-late 60s, and did use the meta angle, but was extremely campy, more akin to “fumetti neri”, as in comic books dealing in crimes, dark subject matters, more geared towards adult, like the famous Diabolik.

While 7 years apart from each other and Bloody Pit Of Horror being in color, i couldn’t help but think of that cheesy flick when i watched Frankenstein 70, as they both use the gothic trappings of the castle setting, though this one sets out to tribute to the older Frankenstein films of the 30s and 40s, but also try to update the Frankenstein myth for the atom age era.

It wasn’t even the first one, far from it, just one year earlier we got both the low budget I Was A Teenage Frankenstein from AIP and Hammer’s Curse Of Frankenstein (which started their Frankenstein series), plus later in 1958 we got Frankenstein’s Daughter, so there was no shortage of Frankenstein films, no siree.

Frankenstein 70 immediatly has that laughable name, which was even more laughable before, Frankenstein 60, as if 2 instead of 12 years made it set in the “distant future”… it didn’t.

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Riecco Aborym (2007) [REVIEW] | Cross Of The Seven Pences (free Talisman inside!)

I wasn’t expecting to do this review until next year, but i was able to luck out and find in early October an used Bluray of that very rare release of Cross Of The 7 Jewels, which includes as an extra the follow up short film Andolfi made in 2007, Riecco Aborym (which translates to “Aborym is back at it again”, more than “Aborym’s Return”) which has been shown at some regional horror cinema festivals in Italy, but never received a proper release or is officially available to stream, even unofficially i couldn’t find it for the life of me.

It’s early Halloween magic, so let’s make an extra unscheduled effort and conclude the tale of the Neapolitan werewolf man fighting the Camorra in the name of love.

Again, as i said at the end of the Cross Of The 7 Jewels review, i think its on us how this short film even came to be, because it became a popular movie to review and mock in the Italian Youtube scene, an internet sensation (thank to peer-to-peer file sharing making this easier to unearth from the folds of history), so i guess Andolfi noticing how suddendly people were talking about his movie, and decided to “do a sequel” 20 years later.

So yeah, in this way i guess it was ahead of the “legacy sequels” curve…. and only that because this isn’t even a sequel.

Heck, i’d argue this isn’t even cinema.

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The Spooktacular Eight #39: La Croce Dalle 7 Pietre/Cross Of The Seven Jewels (1987)

I wanted to do something special for the werewolf entry of this year’s Spooktacular Eight… and then realized i had the perfect movie hidden under my nose, in a way, because in anno domini 1987, in Italy released La Croce Dalle Sette Pietre (lit “The Cross Of The Seven Jewels/Stones”)….. and by that i do mean it got a theatrical release.

In just 2 theathers in the entire frigging country, but if you were lucky/unlucky enough and you lived in Sicily back in 1987 you could actually go to the cinemas and witness what would become hailed as one of the worst Italian movie ever made, ever.

Then again, an Italian horror movie with werewolves, satanic orgies, and the camorra (a Southern Italian specific mafia-style criminal group originating from Neaples) was always gonna be a cult trash film, especially if made on the cheap and treated as an embarassing relic to disregard.

And with good reason, this is some primo trash that feels made for retrospective reviewers to unearth and poke fun at…. which the movie does deserve, because it’s so unbelievably bad it’s downright magical, it’s that kind of “so bad it’s good” you can never forget.

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The Spooktacular Eight #38: Curse Of The Golem AKA It! (1967)

Using this title because – like others realized before me – the original one, It!, was kinda ass and so generic, that even before you could have people confused with the 1990 adaptation of Stephen King’s story, you could have it confused for It! The Terror From Beyond Space from 1958.

No one was gonna confuse the film with 1989’s Soviet satyrical comedy history drama by Sergei Ovcharov, Ono, which also translated to “It”, but then again this is is why it’s better you check before giving your movie a stupid ass and generic title that the marketing tried to spin as a thing necessary to putt butts in seats or some crap like that.

I’d suggest you don’t call your new horror film IT, but nobody would anymore, unless for the inevitable remake of Pennywise story in a couple of decades.

Thankfully for the coulrophobics, Curse Of The Golem (also called Anger Of The Golem for some extra confusion) isn’t about clown or clown-shaped entities, it’s about a very classic monster that was also adapted for cinemas (and even had a series of sorts) well before Frankenstein (which also arguably inspired), the Golem from Jewish folklore.

And while i feel it’s famous enough that i don’t need to explain what a golem is… long story short, it’s a humanoid automaton sculpted from clay or mud and animated via a magic, and while there are many variations of the myth, the classic version has the golem created by Judah Loew, a rabbi in 16th centhury Prague, using clay and put into the golem’s mouth a slip of paper with the name of God written into it, to give the statue life and so it could defend the other Jews of the Prague ghetto from persecution or straight up pogroms.

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The Spooktacular Eight #37: Leptirica (1973)

I’d say we digged a bit deeper than usual this time around, unless you daily dine your eyes on hyper-obscure 70s Yugoslavian vampire films….which you don’t.

Then again most likely you couldn’t, because outside of the Balkans, this movie had been literally uknown for years, and would have still been if it wasn’t for the internet, because if it wasn’t for some people finding, subtitling and sharing it around since 2012, i won’t be even here able to be talking about such an obscure piece of media never meant to leave its country of origin.

Always something peculiar when the movie was made under a nation that doesn’t exist anymore, and when i can claim to actually review a “serbian film”.

Loosely based on a 1880 story called “After Ninety Years” by Milovan Glisic, Leptirica‘s story revolves around the 19th century Serbian village of “Zaroshje” that is plagued by the vampire “Sava Savanovic” who has been systematically killing anyone who takes charge of the flour mill (situated in the woods outside the village). After four millers have been killed the council elders become desperate as food is rapidly running out and the community can’t really survive without the mill.

Meanwhile on the other side of the village a poor young man, Strahinja, is in love with Radojka, the daughter of the local landowner Zivan. After asking Zivan for his daughters hand in marriage and been refused on the grounds of his poverty, Strahinja decides to leave the village, but on the way he is met by members of the village council, who persuade him to take the job of the village miller.

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Hidden Dragon and Crouching Tiger and Sengoku Zombie [MANGA REVIEW] | Warring States Undead (Undead)

Zombies. The horror comfort food, that if an apocalypse actually happened without them, people would somehow make them happen just to not have that Y2K style survival book and mental training for a Walking Dead roleplay go to waste.

After all, we stuck them even in Pride And Prejudice, we had them destroyed by Abraham Lincon, and Sankarea exists to ask questions we shouldn’t really ask.

So of course we were gonna have them mixed with historical fantasy, going basically the Onimusha route but during the Warring States era of Japan (as depicted in popular media like Samurai Warriors more than actual historical drama), specifically reenacting the legendary rivalry between Kenshin Uesugi and Shingen Takeda… in modern day.

Mugen Tenshou: Hidden Dragon and Crouching Tiger and Sengoku Zombie is indeed the manga that dares asks: what if Sengoku era zombie samurais happened today, with a darkness castle emerging out ot nowhere, undead warriors of old, and of course Oda Nobunaga emerges as the Demon King that had been planning this while lying in Hell for centhuries?

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The Spooktacular Eight #36: Snoop Dogg House Of Horrors (2006)

I gotta admit, despite everything (and he sure has bought into some questionable shit) i love me seeing some Snoop Dogg bullshitting around, so yes, have him do a ghetto Cryptkeeper presenting and commenting an anthology of short horror stories themed around an American inner-city ‘hood.

So yes, this is basically a Snoop Dogg licensed “Tales From The Hood”, which i discovered only after locking this into the schedule (and i’ve heard it’s pretty dang good), sorry but we’ll make do.

Yeah, there’s not much to say about the presentation, but i was curious when this showed up on Amazon Prime Video and for some reason has an anime-esque style animated prologue… and yes, it’s because it customary for horror anthologies (as this way they also tribute the old horror comics these films often base their material on), but i was also right, because the animated intro and outro are animated by renowned anime studio MADHOUSE.

Kinda funny because this also predates their work on The Boondocks, though these sequences are stylish but they’re not well animated, let’s be honest, most likely as they were done on the extra cheap, which wouldn’t surprise me, since it’s indicative of the production as a whole.

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Platformation Time Again update plans

I have more updates about the blog to share in the future, but let’s start with something i can confirm right now.

Platformation Time Again not only will keep going as usual (if I could i would make it even more recurring of a rubric), but alongside the EXTEND addendums, a will be dedicating a sub-rubric to collections, compilations, and so on, especially due these are becoming more and more widespread as the industry is really scraping about everything in their back catalogue, and platformers (alongside beat em ups) are a big part of this surge of “new money for old rope”.

Specific rules are being written as of now, but it’s 100 % a thing that will happen regardless.

A couple new EXPRESSO reviews will arrive very soon, in the meantime, and you can read my review of the recently released Heart Of The Beast of you so desire.

See ya.