[EXPRESSO] Overlord: The Sacred Kingdom (2024) | Lichdom: Battlemage

After the 4^th season of the anime, we got a Overlord film, depicting the Sacred/Holy Kingdom Arc that was discussed/teased but not shown during Season 4 itself.

For reference, the series is about a regular guy that get stuck in a VR MMORPG when the servers close, as its character, Momonga, an elder lich, with previous NPCs start acting on their own, including the servants/characters made by his fellow guild members basically electing him as supreme leader, and he’s basically forced to live up to their expectations while plotting schemes for world domination as the Overlord.

The plot here sees Momonga/Ainz Ooal Gown, finally having established its territory and himself as the “Sorcerer King” getting into an alliance with the Sacred Kingdom, needing help to slay the Demon Emperor Jaldabaoth that’s attacking them with his hordes of humanoid monsters..

Again, this is as about as good a synopsis as it gets without doing huge spoilers, and while it strikes a good compromise between being watchable on its own, since the story here presented (picking up the previously established but basically ignored “Jaldabaoth” storyline) has mostly original characters, provides enough closure, and you can guess/deduce some things… having context for the characters and situations definitely benefits the experience (since it doesn’t recap shit, just giving a very brief text explanation of the premise), which does deliver on both the spectacle, violence and some honestly fun, enjoyable “anime isekai non-sense”, including fantasy politics.

I was worried the animation might had the “CG-isms” seen in later Season 3 and Season 4… not as much, the animation isn’t notably better but you can tell there’s a bump in quality and direction to take advantage of it being a film, more battles to show the animation off, etc.

Quite satisfied with it, i must say.

[EXPRESSO] Kraven The Hunter (2024) | Vodka Drunkenski

With the Venom trilogy wrapped up, we’re back to the Sony Spider Man Universe thingie, this time with a character that actually a LOT more well known (not as Venom, but more than frigging Morbius), with Kraven The Hunter, depicting the origin story of the Russian big game hunter villain.

And what a surprise, it’s another pile of toss, but first, the plot.

Sergei Kravinoff, one of the two sons of a Russian criminal (Russel Crowe) , while taking them on a hunt in Tanzania, is attacked by a rare lion, and on the brink of death is given a special potion that not only saves his life, but gives him the power and heightened perception/senses of animals, enhancing his strength, speed, stamina, etc. He leaves home, but years later, after he made himself a name as “Kraven The Hunter” by offing criminals like his father, is forced to confront a menace from the past…

It’s not good, it’s not, that much was fully expected, and it fits the bill of every flaw we expect from these Sony “Spider Man but his name is Voldemort” films: bad acting, uninspired plot, passable at best action scenes, generic characters at best (often with completely unexplained powers, like the assassin with the quasi-Stand ability), uninteresting protagonist, the main villain being a joke, i laughed when i saw the transformation effects, but then again even the CG animals are barely convincing at their best.

It’s not as bad as i expected, but that just shows how low the bar is for these; even so it’s mostly dull, ininspired, and honestly i won’t be surprised if Sony actually pulls the plug on these even before that Sinister Six movie drops.

I will say that’s arguably a bit better than Madame Web, but it’s still toss.

Dynasty Warriors Origins [DEMO] [HANDS-ON] STEAM

I didn’t promise a hands-on first impressions on the demo of the newest Dynasty Warriors game, Dynasty Warriors Origins, because i don’t have a next gen console, and usually i play my musou games like that, but i figured out, there’s a Steam demo as well, maybe my relatively ancient rig can run it fine… and it did, actually surprised me that it’s good enough to run it decently.

So here it my opinions on the demo of Dynasty Warriors Origins, which lets you play one of the classic bouts of the series, The Battle Of Sishui Gate, where the Anti-Dong Zhuo Coalitation attacks united and you also get to meet the demon in red, the mightiest among men, the one you do not pursue: Lu Bu.

So, in case you didn’t follow or knew of this new Dynasty Warriors game, the gist is that you play as a lone Wanderer, a skilled yet aimless martial artist that gets involved into the turbolent battles and political machinations of the characters from Romance Of The Three Kingdoms, so you can basically decide around a bit, and interact and fight alongside the many characters fans of the novel and Koei series have learned to know, love and hate.

It’s not quite an OC or a CAW character similar to how you had a self-insert protagonist in the Samurai Warriors Chronicles games, as the Wanderer is a precisely designed character and so you can’t change much about his looks (nor you can choose for a female option, as far as i remember), not that it matters for the portion of game given by the demo.

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The Super Ninja (1984) [REVIEW] | “Do You Remember, The 21th Night Of September?” Ninjas

Since this is also kind of a “ninja month” for me, time to dwelve deep back into the cut n paste ninjaexploitation we love to discuss here so much…. or is it really this time?

I mean, the movie it’s called The Super Ninja( but you can also find it titled as “Ninja Force”), it does have a different and confirmed director name on both IMDB and the Hong Kong Movie Database, it does fit the bill of a primo subject for the “Godfrey Ho cut-n-paste” treatment… but it’s NOT mostly made out of a different yet similar Taiwanese or Korean chrime thriller, there’s no stock footage lifted.

So, did i make a mistake, assuming this was another Godfrey Ho/Joseph Lai joing when it’s a completely random, stock footage-free ninja flick from the era that just happened to exist and get paired with IFD Films International’s output of super cheap ninja regigs of older, random asian films about crime, guns, or whatever

Because it was distributed under the other company name by Ho and Lai, Filmark International… and then just watching will trigger every flight or fight response by ninja film buffs, because it looks, feels and it’s even edited like the cut-n-paste colored ninja collages, but there’s no recognizable name in the credits that would make the connections made sense and obvious.

Then i found the name “Thomas Tang” attached as producer even in the “recent” italian DVD release by Freak Video, and all made perfect sense, because that is one of Godfrey Ho many film pseudonyms, stuff like the beloved “Elton Chong”, BUT that credit was just added in the international releases because – as already said – Filmark distributed the thing.

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[EXPRESSO] Metal Slug Awakening iOS/PC | Heavy Gaching Gun

Finally someone decided to show its face globally, with a Metal Slug game that’s actually a run-n-gun shooter and not some tower defense or strategy-lite card thingie, Metal Slug Awakening (previously announced as Metal Slug Code J and available for years in SEA markets), aka the closest thing to a new, proper mainline Metal Slug title we’re gonna get with the new SNK.

In an unsurprising yet fitting fashion, it’s very similar to Contra Returns – also on mobile smartphones – not too surprising since it’s from the same developer, Timi (which also worked on Mega Man Dive X), it has an original storyline about a pharaoh and 4 gems, nothing worth committing to memory, as is the kinda rubbish and arguably random english voice acting.

I think they did a decent job at translating the art style to 3D models, though the new character designs really reek of “chinese gacha shit”, they do.

That aside, gameplay is traditional Metal Slug, with actually quite decent touch controls and some controller support (more for the Steam version), some concessions to modernity and a LOT of concessions to mobile gacha freemium design, from exps books and materials for upgrades, multiple tiers of rarity for everything, mini and normal bosses being more spongy so to incentivate using a weapon/character that inflicts more damage or status effects to certain types of enemies.

It’s not bad and the levels are new, but both level designs and foes dip heavily in nostalgia, so expected to see A LOT of old faces from the series’ long history.

Shame the F2P bullshit add various layers of faux complexity to deal with, and can make the difficulty fluctuate heavily.

It’s worth a try, but you actually wanted a proper Metal Slug 8, this ain’t, nor was ever gonna be.

[EXPRESSO] Gladiator II (2024) | Caligulas IV: The Untold Story

I have expressed my qualms with this era of Ridley Scott films before, same for the industry doing legacy sequels and so on.

But in this case, i do have some simpathy for Gladiator II, at least from a conceptual standpoint, given the odds stacked against it by default of following up such a revered movie, especially when the finale of the first did had closure. So, regardless of demand or cliffhangers to continue from, here’s a sequel that picks up almost two decades after Maximus’ death, and focuses on its son, Lucius, sent away to avoid being targeted, only to grow up as a Numidian general and being brought back to Rome as a slave, where he collaborates as a gladiator fighting for slave master/coliseum mogul Macrinus, intent of overthrowing the deranged, deprived and tyrannical twin emperors Geta and Caracalla…

It’s not a bad plot, the new characters are actually quite good and interesting, especially Pedro Pascal as general Acacius, and ESPECIALLY Denzel Washington as the devious Macrinus, the latter actually being far more interesting than the protagonist, Lucius, the reluctant heir to Maximus’s legacy (both literally and figuratively), ast Paul Mescal’s character & performance are simply not as memorable as Crowe’s, even when given more dialogues and speeches.

And that’s the issue, as this sequel struggles with the nigh-impossible quest of replicating the magnitude of the original… and doesn’t manage to catch lightning in a bottle twice.

But to be fair, for a movie that we didn’t really quite need, its attempt at recapturing the spirit and spark of the first movie is quite good, just not as good, but the spectacle is there, the plot is intriguing, the sets magnificent, Rome even more decadent, the political intrigue satisfying, the action brutal, and it does entertain quite a lot.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Arcade: Wrath Of The Mutants PS4 [REVIEW] | Arcades In Times

Since it’s un-officially “ninja month”, let’s talk ninja. Mutant teenage turtles ninjas.

And while their popularity and games based on the series still doesn’t waver, so much that we recently got a tie-in game to the 2023 animated film TMNT: Mutant Mayhem, TMNT: Splintered Fate, and one about the Last Ronin spin-off series by the TMNT original creators coming next year.

But we’re not talking about those, or the well received Shredder’s Revenge.

Nope, we’re going back to 2017, indirectly, thank to the recent release of the 2017 TMNT arcade game by Raw Thrills, in this expanded port (gaining the “Arcade” moniker and a new subtitle since there are literally dozens of TMNT game just called “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles”) handled by Cradle Games and distributed (even physically) by… shovelware maestro Gamemill Entertaiment.

Though this is not shovelware, i had the pleasure to play this machine/arcade cabinet more than once in my local arcades, and it’s quite fun 3D side scrolling beat em up, obviously trying to arken back to Turtles In Time, as these arcade TMNT titles often do, for nostalgia but also because it was indeed a quality title worth trying imitation and the flattery that – ideally – that would imply.

It’s a pleasant surprise regardless, since i doubt anyone was expecting this, expecially given how some digital only TMNT titles have gone delisted entirely, especially made for smarthphones offering and arcade releases. The TMNT Cowabunga Collection is great but some titles will always be bound to being emulated, at best, like the Tiger handheld games and such.

This not the case, as we get the game seen and played in the arcades as well as some new extra levels, which is a good things since Gamemill still asks more than it should for a physical copy, but we’ll discuss that later.

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[EXPRESSO] Red One (2024) | Christmas In Wakanda Pole

The Rock is back, as Santa’s bodyguard in Red One, which comes out in mid-November because fuck it, you’re already thinking of Christmas anyway.

One Red goes for the “Santa Is Real” school of phylosophy, but actually adds something as Santa is real and powerful as the legend says, as true as the various mythical creatures related to his figures, often working for/with him in a hidden Wakanda-esque city-factory, where they prepare all year so on Christmas they can actually deliver children worlwide their gifts in one night, using magic and top-tier technology to be unseen and unheard. This time however a legendary hacker manages to find a flaw in their security, which leads to a mysterious figure kidnapping ol’ Nick.

So its up to The Rock (as Santa’s grand general) to find out who’s responsible, alongside the same hacker that unknowingly helped kidnap Santa, and a gauntlet thingie that gives him bootleg Ant Man powers, because why not, it makes for some fun (albeit not original) ideas and visuals.

As expected, this is yet another one of those that could simply be called “The Rock/Dwayne Johnson movies”, as it features everything you’d associate with the actor and his filmography, so it has monsters, fantasy stuff, action, comedy, The Rock having “legal plot armor”, all in a family friendly package, even more as this one it’s a christmas film, so JK Simmons can’t reprimand Mark Grayson or insult Peter Parker.

The final battle is a bit of an anticlimactic cop-out, but overall, this one of the better ones as of late, far from turds like Black Adam but also definitely above middling and completely forgettable stuff like Red Notice, there’s definitely a bit more creativity and energy to be found in it, making for a decently entertaining action-comedy-fantasy Christmas romp.

Orcs! (2011) [REVIEW] | 3 Inches Of Snooze

Time to rummage through my B-movies DVD collection and pinch one out, in this case salvaging from one of the huge ass bookcase style holders Orcs!, a 2011 direct to video monster on the loose flick with a fantasy twist of sorts.

This time around it’s not mutated bears, cocained panthers, or landlubbing sharks running amok in a place, it’s the green, Dakka loving green boyz, that threaten to invade modern society starting from a US National Park, so it’s up to the resident Park Ranger, Cal Robertson, and his sidekick, Voluntary Cadet Hobie, to stop them hordes from leaving the park.

Sound like a fun little comedy horror B-movie, the formula it’s more than proven, have monsters invade and have two or more dorkuses left as humanity’s unlikely last stand, the cast being mostly made of people you’ve never heard or seen before it’s an acceptable risk and not damning in itself.

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[EXPRESSO] Venom: The Last Dance (2024) | Knull In My Soup

Venom’s most likely uncanonical (for now anyway) adventures with his human host Eddie Brock come to an end in Venom The Last Dance, the third and final movie of the series, already prodiving something rarer than an unicorn for modern superhero films: closure.

Sure, they will most likely do some films about the Symbiotes or whatever later, but this one does actually close this storyline.

Speaking of which, we continue to follow Eddie and Venom’s escape from the authorities, now complicated by the army having captured the other Symbiotes in a hidden desert base, and especially by Knull, an imprisoned god that created the Symbiotes and is sending out monster aliens (called Xenophages) around the galaxy in order to find and retrieve the Codex, the only thing able to break him free.

That said, it’s a Venom film, meaning it’s a mess of garbage that somehow manages to work in spite of the many, many issues it has, and be entertaining enough, sporting a trashy 90s charm, and while The Last Dance’s plot feels more structured and focused (more than Let There Be Carnage), the humour is even worse (it’s funnier when it doesn’t mean to), the villain is easy to forget even exists, characters are prone to overconvenient bouts so the plot can continue, and while the new Symbiotes are cool, they don’t do much until the end.

On the flipside it’s not drawn out, it’s a film that goes by fast, maybe too fast, as it’s hard for anything of note to “sink in”, with the highlights being the Venom Horse and a hippie UFO believer than bring his family along for a road trip to Area 51, for what amounts to a somewhat generic ending to the series and about the same level of “quality” seen before.